Walking the Streets of Georgetown

Next?

2009-05-27T17:42:00.002-04:00

After a rocky finish, I turned in my last paper 10 days ago. My family came, we celebrated. I graduated in the rain. I said goodbye to friends, and I moved out of Georgetown (which means I think I need a new blog name, btw).

So what is next?

Well, I will be the first to admit that I don't know. I had a job offer to work on campus part-time, but as more time goes by I think I may pass. I am continuing to work for Gilco, but I need to find something more permanent. The problem isn't that I don't know where to start, but that I don't know which path I want to take. You would think after 4 years, and $200,000 I would have some sort of clue, but I don't.

Let me.

2009-05-12T10:39:00.006-04:00

This last weekend I went on Senior Retreat. Although I had been looking forward to going to Six Flags with the senior class, I was ultimately unable to go. Thus, when my friend, Jesuit Novice A.J. mentioned the retreat and that I should go I went over to Healy Hall and registered. I think at first I was spurred to go because I didn't want to sit on campus all weekend. But then when I realized that my two best friends were going, I was excited to spend the weekend with them away from campus. I had no clue the weekend in store for me, it was one of the most amazing experiences at Georgetown and in the end I think it was one of my best decisions over the last four years.

Part of the weekend was about God's grace, examining where He had shown up in our life at Georgetown. In both the little things and the big. In the hurt and in the moments where life feels perfect. I came to Georgetown because I was running away. I thought if I got into a prestigious university, I would assure everyone around me and by proxy myself that I was okay. But the truth is that I wasn't, I was hurting. I was broken into a thousand tiny pieces being held together by the thinnest of threads. I was mad at people, I was angry at God, I held hate and contempt in my heart. When I walked through Georgetown's front gates for the first time I was a broken being. I came here broken and I don't want to leave that way.

I graduate in five days and yet still I am broken. I feel unworthy of His love. I feel unworthy of His grace, and I feel unworthy of His forgiveness. And yet I cling to these things and desire these things and pray that someday I will feel worthy. For years there has been an elephant in the room when I sit and talk to God. I could not understand how God could forgive my rapist, the man who sexually abused me for 18 months. I clinged to the self-righteousness that said that it was my pain. I constantly found myself asking God "How dare you take that pain away from me? How dare you offer this monster forgiveness? How dare you ask that I share heaven with this man?"

But you weren't asking those things of me, were you God? You were saying, this burden is heavy let me help you bear it. You were asking, isn't it getting heavy under there carrying your own cross. Here let me take a side. Dear child, let me ache for you, let me hurt for you, give me your hand and let me take your place upon this cross. Let my hands be nailed to it and let the thorns cut my brow. Let my blood flow and let my body be broken. You were simply saying "let me. Let me. Let me." And so I let him.

I found myself this weekend yelling out to Him and crying out to Him. Unloading my burden, one issue at a time. Until there was nothing left that I was carrying, until I felt empty and drained. Because the truth was, I couldn't do it anymore, I couldn't carry this burden alone. It had broke me, I still am broken, but God's grace and love have begun to heal me. And while I am scared of the uncertain future ahead of me I know that on Monday morning I will be okay, because God will be there.

Water, water every where. Well, at least not in China.

2009-04-22T22:45:00.004-04:00

I went to a lecture this morning called Asia’s Next Challenge: Securing the Region’s Water Future at the Woodrow Wilson International Center for Scholars. After waking up late and trying to navigate the International Trade Center complex at 1300 Penn (a hope skip and a jump from where we viewed the Inaugural Parade) I walked in the door a couple minutes late. But thought I would share my notes from the lecture because it was very interesting, particularly if you are concerned about the potential environmental problems facing China in the future.

The two speakers at this forum were visiting fellow at Brookings Institute in Doha, Qatar Dr. Saleem Ali and the Director of the Asian Social Issues Program at the Asia Society Suzanne DiMaggio. Both speakers were members of the leadership group for a new report, Asia’s Next Challenge: Securing the Region’s Water Future (pdf)from the Asia Society, which was the focus of the lecture. The session was moderated by the Director of the China Environmental Forum at the Woodrow Wilson Center Jennifer Turner who was a contributing author to the report, writing a sidebar entitled Water Conflicts Catalyzing China and spoke on many of the issues in the report relevant to China.

Although the lecture was about Asia as a whole, in the following summation I have focused primarily on the relevant aspects to China. The premise of the session and the report was that the majority of the water problems in Asia are the result not of water shortage, but of mismanagement and poor water governance. Additionally water problems in Asia should be considered part of a nation’s security dimension, but warned that effort should be taken so that water itself should not be “securitized.” Solutions to these problems require high-level political will and significant levels of investment with regional communication key.

The first portion of the lecture focused on the transboundary nature of security concerns in Asia. Water in recent years has become a “conduit for cooperation.” China is a prime example. On the Songhua River flowing into the China (43%)-Russian (48%) shared Amur-Heilong basin, China and Russia are working together to developing hydropower stations. The Yalu River is the shared boundary between China-North Korea and North Korea-Russia with the Tumen River basin laying at the intersection of all three nations. Kazakhstan and China have 23 transborder rivers with the 2002 established Joint Committee on Transboundary Rivers overseeing their joint usage. Finally, the Mekong River with China as the upstream state flows through five of its Southern neighbors, here China participates in annual meetings of the Mekong River Commission (MRC) as a “dialogue partner,” though not a member. In the case of the Mekong, China’s dam building on the upper reaches, have changed flow and sediment patterns, and plans to expand damn building have infuriated members of the MRC.

The second portion addressed that the conflict over water is not just an intra-country issue, but an inter-country problem. Turner pointed out that most of the focus on governance of water in China is supply-side. Thus, many demand side problems continue to not be addressed. Continuing conflict in Xinjiang between the Uyghur minority and the Han Chinese may be intensified in the future if urbanization and industry deplete the already scarce water supplies, particularly if it is perceived that the Han receive favorable treatment of water allocation. Demographic changes such as growing populations in China and India, as well as the higher-consumption lifestyles that economic growth brings put further strain on water resources. Growing industry is increasing water demand, while discharge and rampant waste dumping is decreasing the quality of water. It was interesting to note in a discussion about polluter pays or user-pay, Dr. Ali noted that without the efforts of MNCs such as Nike local legislation enacting tougher environmental standards would not have occurred, these MNCs often push local officials to enforce the laws on their domestic competitors. The second part is a new prospective that I did not address, but still supports my term paper for this course.

Access to useable water is one of China’s largest problems. 700 million people in China lack access to clean drinking water. In the north, land degradation and desertification are the main problems. Freshwater per capita in Northern China is only ¹/₁₀ of the world average. In the southwest, much ground water sinks into the limestone where it is inaccessible to the general population. Municipal wastewater and agricultural runoff are the worst contaminators of China’s rivers, with 40% of waters at grade V or V+, unsuitable for drink, agriculture, or industry. The 2,800 chemical factories on Lake Tai, between Jiangsu and Zhejiang, have contaminated water to the point that 2 million people have lost access to drinking water. Contaminated water drainage into the ocean have caused the coastal waters to become dead.

Finally there was discussion about the impact of climate change on hydrology, particularly glacier melt and sea level rise. The Himalayan glaciers are the source of much water in Asia. At current rates it is expected that in 30 years the rivers feeding off these glaciers would become seasonal rivers with flow will be dramatically reduced in the dry season. Glacier coverage in China alone is expected to decrease 27% by 2050. But glacier melt may increase the potential for hydropower generation in the short term. Climate change may also lead to sea level rise. Countries such as Vietnam, Bangladesh, Japan, India, and China are the most at risk.

Solutions poised to the increasing water problems in Asia included: 1) Raising the profile of water security on the political and developmental agendas of national government. 2) Include water in security policy planning, but don’t want military to securitize water, but rather change governments to think of water in terms of their citizens livelihood. 3) Generate better policies through dialogue, including encouraging investment and increased collaboration in water management technologies. 4) Water should be included in early warning systems, the IPCC data on water and climate change data could be used for this. 5) Private sector has technical role, but must be careful with exploitation. 6) Utilize the role of water in promoting dialogue, while drawing on local knowledge. 7) Address emerging water problems through a post-2012 climate agreement. 8) Call on Asian Development Bank to expand their Water Financing Partnership, beyond the initially invested 20 million, with a focus on infrastructure and development of renewable energies. 9) Water issues are fragmented in the millennium development for example drinking water under environment, water as a role in infant mortality and women’s health, etc…, UNESCAP should be encouraged to have an integrated task force to meet 2015 targets. 10) Better water data is needed as government’s often lie and errant policy results, possible expansion of the GEMS system. 11) Water issues should again be made part of US’s policy towards the region.

During the Q&A sessions some interesting points were addressed. The first is that low-set water pricing in China may result in increased demand, and a reluctance to adopt new technologies to improve water quality. However, one should not conflate pricing with privatization, the later being a concern. Dr. Ali encouraged all taps including agricultural to be priced as a method for internalizing use of water. Second, on the issue of Chinese territoriality claims toward Tibet, while ethno-history should not be underemphasized, China’s claims may be strengthen in coming years as Tibet is a major source of China’s water and natural-mineral resources. Third, other multilateral treaties, particularly on trade could serve as a possible forum for water issues. Mismanagement of agriculture, particularly cotton and cash crops, is the cause of many water issues as 70 percent of fresh water usage is for agriculture. The lack of trust and imperative for food security further drive domestic dependence on agriculture. Finally, some water/energy solutions are counter intuitive. The goal to increase biofuels by four times current levels in the future energy mix, will further drive demand for water needed for production. Two-thirds of installed capacity of desalinization plants are in West Asia and the Gulf, but many plants are being built and encouraged off the coast of China. Ironically Chinese plants are being fed by coal instead of solar.

More on Sexual Abuse

2009-03-26T00:08:00.003-04:00

It kinda shocks me to be writing about my sexual abuse again. But if I truly believe that the only way to release rape from its stigma is to talk about it, then I have to be out there in front talking about it. Thus, I wrote the following in response to a letter to advice columnist Cary Tennis at Slate.com. The letter can be summarized as:

Dear Cary, My date rapist is on Facebook as a "person I might know," I want him to confess and admit he was wrong. Should I contact him? -Want Him to Know

I am a fellow survivor of rape. I sat in a courtroom at the age of 18 as my rapist was sentenced and I listened to the judge tell him that what he had done to me was wrong. As I watched him I realized that my rapist still didn't get it, I don't think he ever will. For his sake, I genuinely hope he does someday. I understand the deep soul-crushing desire for your rapist to acknowledge what he did was wrong. Although the details of my experience were different, the pain is the same.

I think what you may be looking for is a validation of your feelings that what he did to you was wrong. His taking advantage of you was wrong, period. His actions were not okay. Know that, cling to that.

All I can offer to you is my perspective, with counseling (which I would highly recommend) I have come to realize that there is nothing that my rapist could ever say to me, there is no punishment that he could ever serve, there is no hell he could ever endure that would make up for what he did. Nothing that could make it right or better. There is nothing that can restore me to the person I was before I was raped. It was this realization that brought me peace, not an apology.

You and you alone are the only person that can make the choice of contacting him. Don't do it because people say you should or people say you shouldn't. Only do it because you want to. Don't do it only because you don't want to. You are the only person who will have to live with the outcome of your decision.

Thus, I agree with Cary. Get into counseling, explore why an apology is important to you. Explore how you would react if he didn't apologize, if it wasn't genuine. If he told you that he wasn't wrong in doing what he did, think about how that would make you feel. You say that you hate to think he was still doing the same thing to other women (I completely relate)... if he told you he hadn't, would you believe him? I think you want to believe that he isn't a monster. I think you want to be able to chuck it up to him being young and stupid. I know it would help me think of the world as less of a scary place if that were the case.

We live in an imperfect, broken world. In a perfect world there would be no need for an apology. But we are moral creatures with a deep sense of right and wrong. When we are wronged, we hurt to the depths of our soul, we may even become angry. And the only thing that has the power of making this world whole, nay each of us whole again, is the power of an apology and the power of forgiveness. It’s hard to have the later without the former. I understand why you'd like an apology, why you'd like to forgive.

But ask yourself who does the forgiveness really benefit, you or him? You may find that the act of forgiveness may have nothing to do with him. If he wants it, he will come find it. If you forced an apology would it mean the same thing as if he freely found you to give it to you. Forgiveness, I believe, has a lot to do with trying to put our own hurt behind ourselves. And if it is true forgiveness, should it be hinged on anything, on an apology? Only you can answer these questions for yourself, counseling gives you the tools to examine your answers.

If I could give one additional recommendation besides entering counseling it would be to give yourself time, don't make any rash decisions. If in six months or a year you regret not contacting him and are still thinking about it, then go for it. I am sure you can always track him down through the mutual friend or the University's Alumni Association and drop a letter in the mail.

Conversely if any guys (or gals) are out there who feel guilty about taking advantage of a non-consenting partner. You can drop a letter in the mail too.

A/N: I have great respect for whomever wrote this response. While I don't agree with it in its entirity (mostly the first paragraph) the rest I think is great advice.

Turn the world on with your smile!

2009-03-25T00:09:00.003-04:00

Did you know to dig straight through the earth to China, one must live in Argentina or Chile, perhaps in a border town in Bolivia? Once you manage to dig that tunnel it would only take you 42 minutes to travel. Just a couple little facts to enlighten my and your day thanks to Metafilter.

It was me vs. the cockroach.... guess who won?

2009-03-12T02:47:00.010-04:00

This cockroach incident reinforced an important lesson... sometimes we are given problems in life to prepare us for even more difficult tribulations. Back in September my roommate and I faced an infestation of ants. In actuality they had begun building an ant hill on the carpet of our room! Because we found it on the Saturday morning of a three day weekend, the university's facilities department was closed and I had to deal with the problem myself. To say I am a squeamish with bugs is a bit of an understatement, though I am getting better. I went to CVS and bought ant/roach spray to kill the ants. Once dead, I vacuumed them up. Problem solved, I stuck the spray under our sink and forgot about it.

While trying to find the little sucker pictured above (he had run down my closet door, stood in front of the room's door taunting me and trapping me inside, then had the gall to hide under my bed!) we looked under the sink to see if he had hidden there. He hadn't (he was actually hiding in my ski jacket, which I am not sure I will ever be able to wear again) but we found the forgotten bug spray. Now armed with more than a tennis shoe and a book, we had a more even fight. Had I not had to deal with the ant problem in September, I would never have been prepared to deal with this much nastier cockroach. Nice moral, huh? But, please, oh please, tell me that this cockroach incident wasn't to prepare me to deal with something even nastier.

Was Georgetown Worth it?

2009-03-02T00:06:00.007-05:00

To get our graduation announcements, the university has each graduating senior fill out the Pulse Survey. They use this data to improve the university as well as part of the data that goes into figuring out how Georgetown ranks against other schools. One of the questions is: If you could go back and choose your university over again, would you choose Georgetown? So I thought I would share with you the five highlights and five complaints about my Georgetown experience.

5 PROS

1) I love my professors

I am constantly amazed by my professors. For the most part they are approachable. They are the top people in their field and they inspire me to do and be better. They are understanding when things are difficult and every single one of them is passionate about what they do. And it always puts a smile on my face when I am researching something or reading about China in the newspaper, that I see my professors name. My favorites - in no particular order - have included Father Gonzales, Michael Wall, Jim Millward, Carol Benedict, Joanna Lewis, Shareen Joshi, Philip Kafalas and Robert Sutter.

2) The dean's staff (at least in the SFS) is awesome

While my friends who are in the College constantly grip about the quality and access to their deans, I have had an amazing experience in the SFS. My dean, Maura Gregory, has been amazing. She hasn't let me fall through the cracks. She works with me to help me achieve my goals and when life is crappy the couch in her office is always open. There are times where I have sat bawling on her couch, overwhelmed by my classes and she tells me what I need to hear. Other times I come in to chat and we talk for an hour. If I see her on campus I get a smile and a wave. She knows my name.

3) Since of Community

"We are Georgetown." Is JTIII's favorite chant, and its mine too. We all know what Hoya Saxa means, and we all know how long its been. We work hard, we party hard. We can hold intellegent conversations and we are all up on the top 25 rankings in the NCAA. And we all agree that the Lauanger Library sucks as a place to study and looks nothing like a modern interpretation of Healy Hall.

Sometimes I walk up O Street just so I can walk through the main gates. This campus feels like home. It has since the first time I visited - that was actually the defining reason why I choose Georgetown. Everyone from the residence staff to the guy who plants the tulip bulbs in the spring work hard so this is a welcoming environment. It is home and come June I will miss it more than I ever thought possible.

4) My Classes have Prepared Me

Whether it has been my core classes or my major classes I feel like they have prepared me for whatever I do when I walk outside these gates. The SFS has a strong core - every student has to take everything from a geopolitical course to political theory, international relations to comparitive political systems, 4 econs, 3 histories, and be proficent in a foreign language.

I am blown away by my courses for my major. I was able to combine history, economics, sociology, international relations, and science/technology classes. My classes included: The Silk Road, Chinese Domestic Political Priorities, Chinese Foreign Policy, China & the US, Tiawan in the 21st Century, Minorities & Frontiers of Modern China, 20th Century Modern Chinese History, Energy & the Environment in China, Gender & Family in China, China & India: Global Technology Powers. I can hold my own about China any day of the week. Having said this there are a ton of classes I wish I could have taken, including classes on security and Islam/Catholicism in China, more literature and history classes too.

Additionally, I have grown myself. My 2 philosopy, 2 theology, and 3 humanities classes (one a research class), have helped shape me into a better person. These classes included: Marriage & Family in Developing Nations, History & Spirituality of the Jesuits, War & its Legay in Chinese Literature, Philosophy of the Mind, Human Rights. This is part of the cura personalities, or care of the whole person, philosphy that Georgetown abides by. I have come to realizations about my own spirituality, I came to have respect for other's religions. I am more compassionate and more understanding as a result. I am a better human being as a result.

5) Amazing opportunities

I met a prince. Prince Charles of Wales to be exact. I also heard a supreme court justice speak, and Former President Clinton. I got an internship at National Geographic which led to a paid position because 2 producers were auditing one of my classes. My crew team one our race at Regionals in 2006. In 2007 I went to Georgia to watch Georgetown compete in the Final Four! I studied at a top university in China. I met a prince... a prince... need I say more.

5 CONS

1) Bureaucracy

Georgetown resides in the nation's capital and sometimes I feel like it is by osmosis that Georgetown has become so bureaucratic. It is frustrating. Parts of the university don't talk with each other. And sometimes it feels like you even need to have an add/drop class form filled out in triplicate - oh yeah, you do.

Housing on campus is a mess. Gosh forbid you go abroad, or want to switch with someone, or move back on campus. Not going to happen without you loosing all your hair first.

2) Listening to Students

There is not much interaction between administators and students. I have never met the university president Jack DiGioia and I doubt I will, until I become a wealthy donor. Most communication comes between the uniersity administrators and the incompitent, ill inspiring, and just as bureacratic student government.

I don't feel like I am being listened to and I think the best change the universty could make is to sit the University President and the VP of Student Affairs Todd Olsen on beach chairs on Healy lawn for an hour once a week. Even a walk through visit to the library or the cafeteria every so often would appease me. I just think the aministrators are out of touch with the average student and it is frustrating.

3) Cost/Tuition

Georgetown is expensive. It's $37,536 a year. With a 2.9% hike for the 2009-2010 school year (which is better than the 5.5% hike we saw before the start of this school year).

That is a lot of money. And it doesn't include each semester: $4,500 for housing, $1,800 for a meal plan, $1,100 for health insurance, $155.50 for mandatory gym membership (classes are $2 more a class), $38 for residential communication fee, $50 student activity fee, $60 per language or science class, AND at least $500 a semester for books. Books aside that's another $15,000 a year.

So all in all $50,000 a year. $200,000 for your degree if you graduate on time. When you think about it that way, does my education have a $200,000 value? The answer is I am just not sure.

4) Impossible to minor

In the SFS it is impossible to minor. You can earn a certificate, but you must write a thesis. And if you want honors in your major you must right a thesis for that too! How many people do you know that are up for writing two theses? The list of available topics to get a certificate in are small. I am not sure why a student can't cross over and just get a minor with the college oh yeah - see #1 - the Georgetown Bureaucracy.

5) Inconstancy between teachers and classes

My largest complaint is how that there is a real inconsistancy between professors and between syllabi of professors teaching the same mandatory course. If a course is mandatory should the subject matter covered be consistant for every student. Often it is not. Comparing my experience with the course comparative political systems with my friend Christina's, mine emphasized revolutions. Her's actually compared different systems. This was discussed in the student newspaper as pertaining to the infamous Problem of God course.

When grad student T.A.s or even worse upper classmen (which is a phenomenon here) guide recitation courses students by and large get frustrated because no one has taught these "teachers" how to teach.

Lately there has been a debate on campus between adminstators, professors, and students. Professors want laptops banned from class because they feel students are being destracted and aren't paying attention. Students feel that the lectures are boriing and they should be allowed to multi-task. As a student it is frustrating when the material that you are required to have prepared and read for the class and reiterated and not expanded up on in class.

Readings should compliment the lecture. Then students won't feel that if they do the readings they don't need to come to class, or visa vera. Plus if you test on material from the classes and the readings, students have to do both. My World History course with Prof. Wall was probably the best utilization of this "Compliment the Lecture Strategy." And in reading travel logs about the time period we studied, we were able to see the time periods we were studying in a deeper manner. Plus the professor has a Colbert sense of humor.

Laptops in class are not the problem, they are a symptom. If classes are interesting students will pay attention and participate. Plus if surfing the web is the problem, they should turn off the spotty wireless access the university has worked, and worked, and worked to install.

To recap...

Top 5 pros: I love my professors, the dean's staff is awesome, there is a definte since of community, my classes have prepared me, and there have been some pretty amazing opportunities available to me.

Top 5 cons: Georgetown is way, way, way too beaurcratic, the university does not listen to students, tuition and costs are through the roof, impossible to minor, and there are inconsistencies in the mandatory classes.

And the answer, if I got to go back knowing what I know now and repick my college world I choose Georgetown? Yes, for all its ills, I would come back and do it again in a heartbeat.

"A Comet of Cooperation"

2009-02-24T20:52:00.007-05:00

Last night as I was walking to dinner, I viewed a bright light off to the west. Since my university sits on the flight path for Regan National Airport here in DC at first I thought it was an airplane, but for the five or so minutes I stared at it, it didn't really move. What it was I was not exactly sure, but I thought perhaps it was a comet, so off I went browsing the internet. Sure enough I came across the beauty to the right. While I doubt that this is what I saw, this comet is at its closest point of orbit to the Earth TONIGHT!

Her name (do we apply the female pronoun to stars?) is Lulin and she is named after the observatory which took her first photograph, Lulin Observatory in Nantou, Taiwan. It was these images that 19 year old Quanzhi Ye, a student at Sun Yat-sen University in mainland China was pouring over when he made the discovery in 2007.

Astronomy is just one of the areas that has seen increased cooperation between the two countries in recent years. Chinese telescopes are by and large weaker than their Taiwanese counterparts. Thus, in recent years astronomers from China and Taiwan have increased collaboratio. Chinese astronomers select areas of the sky for the Taiwanese observaories to watch and photograph.. The result of this partnership, is the discovery of Comet C/2007 N3, aprly nicknamed "Coment of Cooperation."

But not all people are jumping on this idea, as a China Post article makes note that the discovery was hailed as a local find without mention of the Chinese in the mainstream Taiwanese media.

This discovery comes at a time when the relationship between Taiwan and China has been strengthened, or at least their annimosity has weakened. Snce July 61,000 tourists made visits between the two nations, on highly oganized tours. July also marked the begining of the first direct flights between the two nations, planes have to travel through Hong Kong airspace.

At the end of January, in time for the Chinese New Year, a pair of pandas went on display at the Taipei Zoo. They were a gift from China as a symbolic gesture to the newly elected Taiwanese President Ma Ying Jeou, who was elected after urging more economic ties with the mainland and promising not to push independence for the self-ruled island [it probably didn't help that Ma's predesesor Chen Shui Bian, an ardent supporter of independence, is currently in jail awaiting trial on corruption and money-laundering charges.] Together the panda's names mean "reunion" and as a USA Today article commented, "...they're the cuddliest sign of warmer diplomatic ties between China and Taiwan."

Pandas, flights, and stars aside, let's not forget that China does keep 1,300 missiles pointed at Taiwan. The same USA Today article points out that Chinese President Hu Jintao, in a speech on Dec. 31, raised the goal of a peace agreement and did not repeat Beijing's usual threat of violence if Taiwan declares independence but he did maintain the condition of "One China," which is something most Taiwanese do not want. A recent poll in the pro-nationalist magazine Commonwealth showed that 80% of Taiwan adults surveyed oppose becoming part of China.

This increased partnership is not a result of Pandas and tourists, but a result of the commercial trade of goods. As the Council on Foreign Relations explains:

"China entered the World Trade Organization (WTO) in 2001 and, within a month, Taiwan entered as “Chinese Taipei.” Since entering the WTO, China and Taiwan have lowered or lifted tariffs, and eased restrictions on investment, direct trade, and tourism. The volume of two-way trade across the Taiwan Strait marked $115 billion in 2006, up from $8 billion in 1991. In 2005, investments in mainland China accounted for more than half of Taiwan’s overseas investment and Taiwan ranked in the top ten of foreign direct investors in China in 2005 and 2006. China also has become Taiwan’s top export partner and its second-largest import partner."

The question is where does the relationship go from here? Taiwan has long been the elephant in the room, when Chinese and American leaders meet. On Febuary 13th National Intelligence Director Dennis Blair, arguably Obama's top intellegance official, suggested that last year China's budget for military spendng jumped 17.6 per cent to about 61 billion USD, much of which is focused on Taiwan. THe US is required to provide Taiwan with weapon's to defend itself and has hinted in the past that it would come to Taiwan's aid if the mainland tried to invade or force its aquisition. In the last year of the Bush administration, the 6.5 USD billion arms package provided for Taiwan caused a breakdown in the Sino-American relationship.

It will be interesting to see how China-US foreign policy is shaped under the new President's administration. Even as Secretary of State Clinton is in China [which I talked about yesterday], key members of the federal government are arguing about who will handle what aspects of the relationship with China. Clinton clearly wants a large role, as does US Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner. The Vice President's Office wants a leadership role in the relationship with China. Former Washington State Governor Gary Locke who is expected to be announced tomorrow as the Secretary-Designate of Commerce has a long and positive relationship working with the Chinese government. People inside the Beltway expect Obama to unfold key US policy towards China at the G20 this coming April, many are anticipating an announcement on Carbon Emission policy, whether Taiwan will be part of the agenda is unclear.

Tomorrow, I plan on summerizing what we know about Obama's policy towards China thus far.

I AM A SURVIVOR!

2009-02-24T00:35:00.013-05:00

I participated in the cast of the Vagina Monologues again this year. As a freshman, my feminist friend dragged a group of us to see the show and for the first time I experienced the power of the monologues. I'd actually never heard of them before, but I left speechless. The experience opened a door of discussion amongst my closest friends and today none of us are shy about talking about our sexuality. Still it took me two years to get up the guts to try out. Last year, I was part of a monologue about the problems facing transsexual woman, it was called "They Beat." This was a far cry from the piece I preformed this year, aptly titled: "CUNT!"

My first experience tapped in to a part of me that had my sexuality trampled upon. It was cathartic to work through those emotions. This year I spoke as a women who in reclaiming the use of a pejorative word was able to reclaim her own life and her own sexuality. My directors, or facilitators as they preferred to be thought of, helped me find a place inside myself, a memory, a moment in time where I felt the giddiness that comes from conquering the world and being affirmed by it. But at the same time, the pain and hurt of people words and actions. For me it was a moment in an elevator.

1 in 4 women in their life will be sexually abused or assaulted. I was one of them. I am a survivor. And yet as much as the abuse itself was painful and life altering, the response of people around me was soul crushing. It took me years to realize that if people didn't want to support me, I didn't need nor want their support. I realized that in an elevator on a September day, we were leaving from the sentencing hearing. My abuser was going to jail, I felt like I could conquer anything. As we climbed into the elevator, so to did my abuser's friends - they were also the parents of some of my best friends from high school. I wasn't and to this day don't remain on speaking terms with any of them. But even though I left the courtroom feeling validated, I felt weak and scared in that elevator.

I have always been upfront about my own history fueling my participating in the Monologues, but when my director approached me about being interviewed for an article in the student newspaper I froze. There was a part of me that wanted to talk about it, but there was a part of me that was still scared. I was scared that the way people reacted to me years ago - as if I had the plague - would happen all over again. In some ways people's responses hurt worse than the abuse itself. People wondered why it took me years to come forward, and when the truth came out my worst fears were realized. I was afraid of being hurt all over again.

But I realized that if I didn't talk about it I would only be allowing those fears to fester and I would only be allowing those fears to fester in other women. There is a world of women out there that have been molested and abused. I am one of them and if we don't talk about it- the positive and negative parts of sex, about the painful parts of our sexuality, if we don't talk about these things - then they become taboo and we are made to feel shameful about them by society. We are made to feel shameful about parts of ourselves. No one should feel that, ever!

I can't go back to that moment in the elevator and tell those people "shame on you" for standing behind a child molester, for supporting him. I can't tell them that they make me sick. I can't tell them they were wrong. I know they felt they were doing the right thing at the time and with hindsight I now see that in a situation such as that, there really isn't a "right-thing." But last week in screaming the word "CUNT!" to a room full of a hundred strangers, I found myself somehow telling the world that with one word I and I alone will define how I feel about myself and there is no derogatory word in any language that can make me feel otherwise.

When it came down to it I knew I had to speak up, because I wish someone had spoken up when I was hurting. If you are reading this and have been abused, or raped, or assaulted I want you to know you are not alone. You will never be alone. There is a sisterhood of women ready to wrap their arms around you. I want to wrap my arms around you and cry with you and laugh with you. If you need to talk with someone you can call the Rape Crisis Centers 24 hour hotline at 1-800-656-HOPE(4673) or visit the National Sexual Assault online hotline. Both of which are anyonomus. Or if you feel so inclined you can contact me by email.

And If you didn't catch the link to the article you can read it here.

UPDATE: There are weekly Sexual Assault and Relationship Volence Support Services through the Women's Center on the 3rd floor of Leavy. Jen Schweer, Sexual Assault Health Issues Coordinator will be in the Women’s Center every Wednesday starting from 4pm-6pm. If you have questions please contact the Center at 202-687-6359 or Jen at jls242@georgetown.edu

The Bitting of one's Tongue

2009-02-23T21:56:00.011-05:00

Did you know in 1957 shortly after the Chinese revolution that brought Mao to power and china's population stood at 672 million (half of today's 1.21 billion) a report was released that warned that China's rapidly growing population was jeopardizing the country's development?

Although the author Ma Yinchu, the President of Beijing University, with a Master of Economics from Yale and Ph.D from Columbia (that's to say he's a smart guy), categorized himself as Marxist, national newspapers attacked him, aligning him with the English "reactionary" Rev. Thomas Malthus (1766-1834). Malthus had publicly rejected in his Essay on Population England's welfare laws, while supporting war and famine on the working class population. Chinese, Soviets, Marx and Engels all had condemned Malthus as an apologist for the bourgeoisie. In the case of Ma's report, it was seen as using demographic analysis to explain away the capitalist exploitations that caused people's sufferings.

By 1960 this pressure had forced Ma to resign from his position as well as all of his government posts. For the next twenty years Ma was silenced, unable to lecture or publish. Judith Shapiro, called this "one of the greatest mistakes of the Mao years." She argues that had Ma been able to continue to warn about the dangers of population growth , there might have been public dialogue and debate and China could "have adopted vigorous planning programs in time to head off the population crisis." There is a saying in China, "We lost one Ma Yinchu but we gained an extra 300 million people."

I share this story to underline China's history with people who question the state's authority or ideology. Ma was rehabilitated at the age of 98, but most people who were persecuted under Mao's famous Hundred Flowers campaign - in which Mao called for advice for the country's improvement and then turn around and jailed anyone who spoke up - were not.

This isn't a practice only rooted in Chinese history, need I remind you that this summer will mark the twenty year anniversary of Tiananmen. And yet, this practice still happens in modern day China. If you will remember, China announced a permit process and designated areas for protests at the Olympics last August. China touted the empty zones during the Olympics. What you may not know is most people who applied were rejected and those who received a permit were arrested: in January one man, received a 3 year jail sentence and one man is serving an opened ended sentence. The Human Rights Watch said that the Games became a catalyst for intensified human-rights abuse. Really, it was the Hundred Flowers Campaign all over again.

Today, China announced that a 62-year-old woman named Zhong Ruihua, who had traveled to Beijing to protest will be brought on charges of Disturbing the Peace. Yes, during the Paralympics in August she traveled to Beijing along with 10 people from Luizhou, Guangxi for the intent to protest against the the common practice of seizure of property by the government. However, it is important to note that Zhong was not protesting at the time of her arrest, and had not yet protested anything. Yet, an hour earlier in an interview with the New York Times she had stated her intent to protest. She was arrested upon exiting her hotel and was not heard from, quite frankly the government wouldn't even confirm she was in custody until yesterday. The NYT at the time published a story about the would-be protester's disappearance.

But what is most concerning is not that the Chinese government viewed a 62 year old woman as a threat, but amongst the 11 people jailed a 4 month old baby was included. No one has heard from the child or her mother since. And to think Clinton in an effort to keep the peace with China during her recent visit (after all the US government needs China to keep buying our T-Bills), never once publicly raised the issue of human rights violations in China.

This is such a stark change from her visit to China in 1995 where she publicly admonished the Chinese government in front of 5,000 hand picked party members (the speech was blacked out on domestic television and in the press) saying:

"Freedom means the right of people to assemble, organize, and debate openly.... It means respecting the views of those who may disagree with the views of their governments. It means not taking citizens away from their loved ones and jailing them, mistreating them, or denying them their freedom or dignity because of peaceful expression of their ideas and opinions."

It's such a shame that Clinton has changed her tone. Personally, having studied Sino-US foreign policy it would not surprise me in the least to learn that Zhong appearance before the court (remember, China does not have due process) coincided with Clinton's arrival in China. Coincidence? I am apt not to think so. But I am not sure that the mere presence of Zhong alone and not the other missing would-be protesters was enough of a concession on the part of the Chinese to account for Clinton's silence on the issue when she clearly feels strongly (remember her comments during the Primaries calling on US to boycott the Olympics in response to the Tibet Protest crackdown?).

Yes, the US needs China's cooperation on many issues, including regional security (North Korea), energy and climate change and global economics and finance. But what is often forgotten is that in this age of globalization China needs the US just as much if not more, due to the dynamism of the Chinese economy. Many people fear the Chinese selling US T-bonds, or at the least not purchasing more. The Chinese economy is dependent upon the US, Europe, and Japan for growth. It is access to these markets that China jepordizes. If the US sells their T-bonds, it would not be a far stretch of the imagination for Washington to retaliate with protectionst policies.

Clinton's silence on the issue of human rights during her trip marks a de-link human rights from other U.S. concerns. In failing to make clear of our expectations of China, i.e., insisting that Beijing abide by key universal principles in handling issues such as labor standards, environmental protection, human rights, Tibet and Taiwan, the US sends the wrong message to both the world community and Asia. As the US supports the incorporation of China into the world system, it needs to as a "responsible stakeholder." At this time they have shown they are not responsible international citizens; for the reality of the fundamental character of the CCP regime lie in the issues of human rights as well as Taiwan and Tibet.

As Clinton explained, the policy that America is "seeking to reach consensus on issues that are less contentious than Taiwan, Tibet and human rights" and while the U.S. must continue to "press" Beijing on such issues, such pressure "cannot interfere with the global economic crisis, the global climate change crisis and the security crises." Clinton though doesn't seem to realize that she is creating unintended side-effects. In the discouragement of activism for democracy and human rights within China, Clinton is granting Beiijing an even freer hand to throw its military and diplomatic weight, especially in relation to Taiwan and Tibet, and, ironically, the erosion of Washington's leverage in bargaining with Beijing on economic issues.

2009-02-23T10:50:00.008-05:00

I've been quiet for the last few weeks here on the blog, mostly because I took some time off to think about the direction of this blog.

From here on out those who tune in are going to hear about what I am interested in [China, China, social media, China, marketing, well you get the picture], and even the not so interesting stuff I have to read for class [economics, anyone?].

Thus, I hereby swear to do my best to fill these pages with things that you my readers might find interesting. I will discuss topics, share links, post parts of my papers, occassionally vent personal grievances and may even embarrass myself with the stories of the stupid things I am known to do. I'd be honored if you'd tag along.

Straight out of the Admissions Catalog

2009-02-08T16:02:00.004-05:00

Today just seemed like one of those perfect college days. It was a wonderful 63 degrees outside with a warm breeze and blue sky overhead. I had a Vagina Monologue rehearsal out on Copley lawn for two hours. We did crazy theater games and then we each preformed our monologues. At the end of my piece, I screamed the word "CUNT!" As a freshman, I don't think I would ever of had the balls to do it. But I did, and it has been one of my favorite performances so far.

Afterwords Christina came down and we studied for a bit while 'tanning'. In the background guys were playing frisbee without shirts and people were laughing. U2's Beautiful Day played on my iPod. It was the type of day that makes one want to remain a college student forever. I think I needed these couple hours of peace, I have a tough week ahead.

Chinese quiz Monday, Paper Proposal due Tuesday, Midterm Thursday all while I have 3 hour Vagimon rehearsals in the evenings and performances on Thursday and Saturday. If I can get through Thursday evening I should be good though.

Update: It's not an issue of if I get through. One way or another the clock will stick midnight on Thursday, the question is if I will be smiling like a princess, or rotting like a pumpkin.

The coolest thing I've ever seen.

2009-01-27T19:33:00.003-05:00

It is called Photosynth... and was designed by a Ph.d. student at UW working with Microsoft. It hyperlinks together photographs in a three dimensional plane allowing you to move through space, by marrying photos together. I am not doing justice in explaining it at all. But it is amazing!

You can read and watch a video about it here.

You can play with it here. Try it for last week's inauguration.

祝你未来的一年里，心想事成, 事事如意。

2009-01-25T22:56:00.003-05:00

The lunar new year is less than an hour away... the year of the ox awaits. As the Ox (or Niu in Chinese) is the sign of prosperity through fortitude and hard work it should be a good year, don't you think?

Happy Chinese New Year everyone!

I heart the Fifth Amendment

2009-01-22T19:54:00.009-05:00

On October 3rd, my family's life shifted. We went from talking about plans for Thanksgiving, Christmas, and my upcoming graduation to talking about the next minutes, hours, and days -- about funeral services, police statements, and the fact that life is a very, very precious and precarious thing.

Today plane tickets were bought for my family to attend my graduation from college in May. I was a bit frustrated with the chunk of my day that it was taking and it was only in retrospect that I saw the normalcy of it. I sit here tonight thankful that my family is able to think five months out, that we are no longer doing damage control and holding our lives together.

I say this because we got good and bad news this week. The bad news is that Little Bo is facing a charge for the accident. The good news is apparently someone in the city government issued a traffic citation while the more serious charges sat on the county prosecutors desk. Not only did they issue them, but the traffic charge file doesn't even include the police report! It was only because the file did not contain the police report, and there was discussion about how to get evidence from the police report entered into the record without it being hearsay, that we would find out the great news.

It turns out that this violation is a city statute that doesn't line up with the state code. This means the charges can't be amended to include more serious criminal charges at the Superior court level. When Little Bo pays the fine, the city will be forced to close the case. Then under double jeopardy rules the county prosecutor won't be able to issue further charges based on the same evidence. Additionally, the only time details of the case would ever be released is if a judge orders the file to be opened. I think it will be the best $124 dollars that we have ever spent

Writing this check my family looks once again to the future. Little Bo has been talking about colleges, and he has taken a renewed interest in school. I am so proud of him for coming through this standing tall.

One last post on the Seattle Times site.

2009-01-21T16:23:00.005-05:00

I don't anticipate writing any more. I wrote a couple short things and submitted them with pictures earlier in the day, but its understandable that they weren't posted. All five items that I put thought into writing were published as well as 13 photos.

You can read the last post about my experience at the Inaugural Parade here.

Inauguration Photos...click to see in detail!

2009-01-21T12:04:00.003-05:00

I've only done post-processing on the photos I submitted to the Times, which was about eight if I remember correctly, so most of these are raw. If you look, there is one photo of me in there... it's sorta like Where's Waldo. Will try and post other photos from the weekend, right now, I've got to get back to school work.

Inauguration!

2009-01-19T20:37:00.003-05:00

I am one of twenty Seattlites who are blogging for the Seattle Times... you can read my post here:

The Presidential Motorcade
A visit to Arlington Cemetery
Notes from the Inaugural Concert
DC before the Storm

What do I want?

2009-01-14T18:40:00.004-05:00

While I haven't said a lot lately, I have been doing a lot of thinking. In the last couple weeks I have identified that my hope for the new year is to learn to accept living life on its own terms. The last year has shown me that we really have no control over life, which is actually very terrifying. In the idea of the Buddhists, everything is temporary, because this does not align with our expecitation of the world, we are filled with suffering. I don't know about you, but I am tried of feeling disappointed.

For a long time I have made decisions about my life based on what I expected others expected me to do. Not only is that very twisted reasoning, it speaks to my underlying view of myself. I don't trust myself to make decisions about myself. Well that stops this minute. The only person who has to live my life is me, so it only makes sense that I make decisions based off what I want. I have spent the last several weeks trying to answer that question - what do I want - and I commend you if you can answer it for yourself, because I still don't have an answer.

There is a part of me that is exhilerated by the fact that the world is my oyster, but there is a part of me who is scared and blind walking forward into the world before me. At the end of my life - whether it is tomorrow or in seventy years - I want to be proud of myself. Not just my accomplishments, but the person that I am. So I am going to turn the focus away from the what of my daily life and towards what I want out of this life.

The Joys of Being Home!

2008-12-28T19:03:00.004-05:00

I think it is hard for every college student to come home. On one hand you miss your family, but on the other there is so much growth which occurs away at school, and it seems like it is not honored at all. For example, ways I have grown:

if my dad and brother want to live in a bachelor pad... so be it I won't complain... buy I also won't clean it
if they want to cook food that is unhealthy... I will just take smaller portions... but dont get offended if I don't take as much as you or choose not to eat it
if my dad wants to take up smoking again... I will hold my breath and not berate him with my opinion... but don't make me feel wrong for having a problem breathing second-hand smoke
if my dad wants to date women I disapprove of.... I will be civil towards them... but I don't have to be their best friend
if Little Bo want to hang with friends instead of me... I will kiss him on the cheek as he runs out the door... but I shouldn't have to chauffeur him

While I think I would have gotten pissed at these situations if I had come home to them freshman year, I have grown up. I don't think it is asking a lot for you to react equally in return. Instead when I come home, it seems my dad wants to do all these projects while I am home and I am left to question why he never has the desire to work on projects when I am away at school. It makes me seem like I am only important for manual labor.

Yes, I was the matriarch of the family in high school, I cooked and cleaned and as much as I hate to say it I provided a lot more parenting towards Little Bo than I should have had to do. I knew that unless I went away to school, that would continue to be the position in my family, so I left. I take good care of myself at school. I do my school work. Feed myself. Keep my room clean. I even do my laundry. I do it for myself and I don't need prompting.

I am sorry if I have given up caring about the state that you keep your house in or your life in. But don't think this is a sign that I can't take care of myself. If I am going to cook it is because I want to do it. As I am making the brownies from scratch that I want to make, don't throw every boxed brownie or cake mix at me and say I should make them. That is both ungrateful and demanding. And it makes me want to go back to school.

By the way, I have nine days before I go back to school. Plenty of time to test out my new espresso machine. And I would set it up, but I can't get anything else to fit on the counter because it is covered in your crap. And I really don't feel like cleaning up any more of your crap. So why don't you clean the kitchen and then I will test it out. In the meantime, stop bothering me about it and let me enjoy my vacation.

Christmas Eve!

2008-12-25T00:29:00.003-05:00

Christmas is two and a half hours away, and it doesn't feel like it at all. I don't know what it is suppose to feel like, I guess not just another day. Sans the fact there is snow outside it could very well be July.

When I was in high school I was part of one of the largest Christmas pageants in the region, it started with a concept sketch by February, Script approval by August, auditions in September, dress rehearsals and set building the weekend of thanksgiving and ten shows prior to Christmas. In other words it was all consuming.

Christmas Eve morning was spent opening presents with my mom and Christmas Eve with my mom's family. Midnight Mass and then to bed for Christmas with my Dad. Christmas was always so magical... there was an adrenaline preceding the holiday...

The year before I left for Georgetown, I stopped participating in the production. I no longer saw eye-to-eye with the powers in charge, so I walked away. My first year home from college, I had the flu. Sophomore year we didn't have power. Junior year I had an ear infection. This year is a White Christmas, but since we have been snowed in since my arrival on Thursday none of the normal festivities have occurred. No nutcracker, no trip to see the gingerbread houses at the Four Seasons, no Christmas Carol play. I was at school so I didn't participate in Buckeye Sunday. With the snow I have yet to see any friends or any extended family. Never mind the fact that in the lead up to Christmas I was so consumed with school that I couldn't give Christmas its due attention...

Did I mention that we are snowed in and the Christmas Eve dinner was canceled and moved to this weekend after the snow melts. Family couldn't get here, heck we couldn't even make it out for church. Let alone venturing over for the exchange of presents with my Mom this morning, and I am sure she is disappointed. Heck, I am disappointed. I am counting my blessings, yes. I am glad I am home with family, which is what really matters. But I also miss my friends... I know Christina is having a tough trip in Mexico and I don't know how to make it better. Life is tough right now what with Little Bo's accident, the economy, 18" of snow, and for some reason a heavy heart. It just feels like something is missing.

And I guess what I am saying is there is not a lot of peace or joy around here, and I wish there were. So wherever you are, here is wishing that your day is filled with peace and joy. I hope you have a very merry Christmas!

Shopping in the snow!!

2008-12-24T03:31:00.005-05:00

I've been quiet for the last couple days, I am not sure exactly why. Maybe a change of environment or the change of pace. I've also stayed away from the computer and tried to pick up books instead... most internet access has been from my blackberry. So far the trip home isn't what I expected, but that doesn't mean that it hasn't met expectations.

Tomorrow starts the Christmas festivities in full for my family. Christmas with my mom in the morning and her extended family for Christmas Eve dinner. Christmas with my dad on Christmas Day. Somewhere in there will most likely be a visit to church. But all this depends on the ability to leave one's house... which is pushing it at this stage. There is compact snow and ice on almost every road: 9"of snow fell shortly before I arrived, another 3-5" since, and another 3-6" is expected tonight. The city of Seattle owns 27 snow plows and they can't salt the roads due to the ecological impact so we won't be driving anywhere.

This poor college student has done most of her shopping. After being snowed in, sans taking my puppy for a walk, I couldn't take it anymore. There is still no way that one can drive up the hill my father's house sits on, so I had to walk... to the mall... don't worry it is less than a mile and for this city girl, that ain't nothing! But remind me who decided to build an outdoor mall in Seattle? Where it rains 150 days out of the year??? And every 4 or 5 years we get a snow storm from hell...

For all the shopping I have done I have not spent a dime. I have used almost every gift card I owned though and after getting $4 from my mom (which was the difference for buying the biodegradable version of a product) I used this small bit of cash to pay the difference at Pier 1 and to buy felt at the arts and craft store. So now have a gift for everyone.

So why am I heading back to the mall tomorrow? Well because I left two gift cards at home this morning and I am continuing to hunt for this particular hoodie that my brother wants (my dad is in need of another gift for Little Bo). So back to the store I will go. When all is said and done I think I will have done well; I am very proud of my purchases.

Dear Mister X or should I say Mister S,

2008-12-15T23:49:00.007-05:00

Dear Mr. X,

Me, myself, and I alone have taken a vote, and 'we' have decided to change your nickname from Mr. X to Mr. S... while you may think that this S may stand for such words as supportive, sensitive, studly, sexy, or even sweet. You would be wrong, 'we' mean S as in S-T-A-L-K-E-R, S. And to help you to become more efficient in your stalking... you can find all 'our' posts that mention Christina here... all 11 of them.

I am sure you are a decent guy and you will make someone, someday happy. But you should know that there are times where you have made Christina miserable. You and you alone have made her cry. And while there is no one I would rather laugh with or cry with, I would go to the ends of the earth and back if it meant preventing those tears.

I have held her as she cried over you, because you weren't supportive, because you never came to visit, because you didn't trust her, because you accused her of cheating and lying, and you called her whitewashed. When she was scared and vulnerable you threw her devotion to and sacrifice for you back in her face. There is no talking or explaining that could erase the hurt you have caused her, because the truth is she doesn't deserve any of it. She deserves to be loved, she deserves to laugh, she deserves to be happy. She deserves these things because she is without a doubt beyond amazing. More amazing than 10,000 Georgetown 'red velvet' Cupcakes and that is saying a lot.

And since she is awesome, I understand why you keep calling, and emailing, and checking her (and my) blog. But if we really and truly love someone, their happiness should mean more to us than our own. So I am asking you to let her go.

Besties' Bestesty,
Ashley

20 Whole Days!

2008-12-15T17:57:00.004-05:00

Christina just posted about her planned trip to Mexico over the break. I am so psyched for her to go to Mexico and jealous too. Mexico is warm, Seattle is well cold at the moment. And by cold, I mean freezing as hell, okay not hell... you know what I mean. It is so cold that they broke the previous low record temperature this morning, hitting a shivering in your boots temp of 19 degrees. Jealous is an understatement.

Christina was lamenting the fact that she can't believe she will be in Mexico in 5 days.... that somehow it seems so near and far at the same time. I can't believe Thursday night I will be in Seattle. 80 hours from now I will be home.

But this also means that in less than 72 hours Christina will be leaving me. What am I going to do without my Christina for 20 whole days. 20 days... I don't think I've been more than 20 hours without seeing her all semester... okay it is probably more like 72, but 20 whole days....

"Not Me!" Monday

2008-12-15T01:53:00.010-05:00

I was so not deliriously tired today that in addition to waking up late, I did also not take 2 naps today. I need to study, not nap. I can sleep when finals are over in four days! So it was not me that couldn't keep my eyes open.

In my tiredness, I did not put on two different shoes yesterday and walk around in them until my roommate pointed it out. Because I most definatly had the energy of the energizer bunny I, even after she pointed it out, did not kept wearing two different shoes until they naturally got discarded under my desk.

On that note, I did not wear my pajamas to breakfast on Thursday and I did not proceed to continue wearing them all day long, through an all nighter in the library, and into Friday morning. It was also not past 2:00 in the afternoon on Thursday that I realized that I never put a bra on that morning and on Friday I was still not, not wearing one under my sweatshirt.

When I finally went to leave the library on Friday morning, I did not have to go looking for my shoes. I did not have to look on at least two different floors for them, since I couldn't remember when I had actually last wore them. That was not me walking around the pretty disgusting library without shoes or socks on because I would never walk outside into the torrential downpour and become soaked to my shins in water.

My sleep deprivation did not cause me to take off my socks, earlier tonight and throw them in the trash instead of the dirty clothes basket a foot away. What would compel me to throw away socks? Huh?

I so did not have only one meal today, supplimented by a very, very small apple, a bag of half popped popcorn, and a cup of tea. That is completely not healthy. I am not secretly delighted that I seem to be losing a little weight on this unintentional Finals Diet.

I should be taking care of myself, not starving myself.... so I do not count the little successes in life, like the fact that I had two whole meals yesterday as sucesses. Eating two meals is so not considered healthy eathing.

It is completely not-pathetic that we were kicked out of the cafeteria on a Saturday night, because they were closing. Again, being kicked out of the cafeteria on Saturday night is NOT pathetic.

We did not spend almost two hours procrastinating in the cafeteria. While there the three of us did not get into a Trix fight. We were so not the three girls laughing over who could get the most Trix cereal pieces into the others coffee. We are not three, and we do not play with or throw our food. Afterwards, I did not proceed to drink the coffee anyways that would be discusting.

Speaking of playing with food... tonight, I did not take two oranges from the cafeteria and proceed to juggle them all the way back to my room. I did not find amusement in that at all, that would just be sad. Sad, yes, and funny

Your Jaw Will Drop!

2008-12-14T19:42:00.002-05:00

I spoke with Miss Angela earlier thie evening and she has some amazing news to report over on Rodney's Blog. Go check it out, your jaw will drop.

Besides that, the world continues as normal. I have one more paper and two more tests to complete before Thursday. I feel like I will blink and I will be on the plane home.

I've been invited to go skiing with my Aunt. I didn't go last year, and I really want to go up, but I have so much to do. So I will think about it. I hope your holiday preperations are coming along nicely.

Happy Holidays!

Mr. B, Mr. H, and Mr. X

2008-12-13T22:27:00.007-05:00

In friendship one creates words and nicknames for things. For instance the word "tropple" has entered our lexicon. It means when you catch yourself from falling flat on your face, most likely a result of tripping over the uneven bricks of Georgetown's sidewalks. At least once daily, Christina or I tropple, and the thing about troppling is you have to admit it. You are not allowed to deny it, but since you only troppled and not tripped it is somehow okay to admit. Christina and I were walking back from grabbing coffee when a girl walking towards us totally troppled. Without thinking Christina called "TROPPLE" reather loudly and out of respect looked away. I on the other hand cracked up laughing! Yes, I am a bad person.

Lately, we have been referring to the men in our life as Mr. B, Mr. H, and Mr. X even though they all have perfectly useable names. We like to think it is in the way that Carrie Bradshaw always referred to John James Preston as Mr. Big. Mr. B and Mr. H hold so much potential. Mr. X, well neither of us want to think of him ever again. Mr. X stands for Mr. eX-boyfriend.

I am so glad that this week she has flat out told him she doesn't want him to be a part of her life. He has put her through hell and now is guilt tripping her into getting back together. The crazy thing is they never officially dated and she hasn't even talked to him since September; in fact in her mind it has been over since before she went to study abroad in Spain. He just needs to get over it and learn to use English grammar in the process.

Mr. H on the other hand is sugar, spice, and everything nice. He makes Christina happy and even with the lack of sleep, she has been glowing lately! Not that it really matters, but I approve AND I even had a hand in getting them together. hehehe...

The Finals Diet!

2008-12-12T07:41:00.004-05:00

Five no nonsense steps to guaranteed weight loss before the holidays!

Work for 10 hours straight without leaving the library, forgetting to eat in the process
Conveniently remember to eat only after the cafeteria has closed for limited finals hours
When you do find food, become nauseous with worry that you are losing out on precious time to study by eating. So you lose your appetite and just pick at the food.
Drink lots of coffee and energy drinks to boost your metabolism and stay awake
Pull all nighters so your metabolism doesn't slow with sleep

Welcome to my life. I realized yesterday (Wednesday) was the first day in as long as I can remember that I ate 3 square meals at roughly the time that normal people eat. I got 2 in today (and by that I mean yesterday) only to be told that tonight (again last night) was the final night of Late Night (food available between 9-11pm) due to limited finals hours. The body can go three weeks without eating, right? Okay, just making sure.

And the weird time thing going on above, well that is because I have yet to go to sleep, and at this point I don't know when I will be able to hit my pillow next.

Oh and apparently Jeff the Unicorn, who has taken up residence in my closet, prefers to snack on midgets, or so Little Bo tells me...

Isn't this Cool!

2008-12-11T11:17:00.002-05:00

Courtesy of my Aunt who works for Disney....

Wow! Wow! Wow! Wow! Wow!

2008-12-10T15:10:00.004-05:00

This morning Georgetown announced that 1940 alum and former regent Robert L. McDevitt, bequeathed $75 million dollars to Georgetown! You can read about it in the campus paper 'The Hoya' and in the Washington Post.

Mr. McDevitt's donation from his passing last September is 2.5 times the largest donation in Georgetown history The old record is $30 mil from Robert Emmett McDonough, who has the gym and the business school named after him. Although a portion of the money is to be directed towards endowing faculty positions, with specialties in religion, Catholicism, science, and technology. I am sure something on campus will get named for him... I don't know maybe the new business building or science buildings ... or maybe the entire campus.

Perhaps the University will actually reinstate work on the $100 mil science building they put on hold because of the volatility of the capital markets and the need to borrow $50 mil. Oh how much fun it would be to refer to this new building as "I'm going to MickeyD's for class." Not like I'd be here anyways...hehehe.

On a serious note, as a student I thank you Mr. McDevitt. And so do my parents, perhaps GTown will let up on the fundraising calls, as a result.

Tomorrow...

2008-12-09T23:24:00.003-05:00

Tomorrow evening my brother and parents will meet with a defense attorney. We have been made aware that the police will be recommending that at least one charge be filled against Little Bo. If you are not aware, Little Bo was driving home from a football game when he was involved in a pedestrian fatality accident. I don't want to get into the details of the accident as this is not the time or the place. But I will say that we have seen the police report and medical eaminers report. From what Little Bo says and what the reports say our family believes that Little Bo was not negligant in his driving that night. We believe that he did everything right and in spite of this the pedestrian was killed.

What we know is that the police department will be sending a recommendation to the city prosecutor. This is actually a blessing because it means that the charges being recommended are either a traffic violation or misdemeanor. The city prosecutor does NOT handle the vehicular manslautor level charges. We are inclined to believe that they will be recommending an "inattentiveness while driving" charge. This is a blanket traffic violation that covers everything from excessive speed, to talking on one's cell phone. However, since it is a blanket charge the sentencing recommendation is the big unknown.

We are fortunate enough to have been recommended to this defense attorney. However, with the economy tight right now, particularly for our family and the defense attorney does not come cheap, we are not sure how we will pay for the attorney. But we will figure out a way. We have our fingers crossed that our auto insurance will cover the retainer (as the insurance company has a stake in the outcome of any criminal charges as Little Bo being found guilty makes civil charges easier to prove).

So if you can pray that:

1) the Lord prepares Little Bo's heart for what he will hear tomorrow.
2) the Lord will work on the heart of the city prosecutor and judge in Little Bo's case
3) the Lord will provide a financial means for Little Bo's defense
4) the Lord will guide Little Bo's defense
5) and as hard as it is to say, that ultimately God's will alone will be done.
6) and as always we ask you also to continue praying for healing for the victim's family and for the other individuals who witnessed the accident

My bestesty friends and Possee

2008-12-09T03:59:00.007-05:00

My friend, Christina, wrote in her blog post yesterday about why she loves her best friends... and I happened to be the only person mentioned by name... I don't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing. "Ashley likes to talk about sex openly" which has now become an inside joke, because I again did it tonight as we walked back from Study Snacks from The Tombs. Oh great...

Anyways I wanted to introduce to you my Bestesty Friends. I went through a difficult period in my life between high school and college. I walked away from almost everyone of my friends from High School (which is a story for another day) and I arrived at Georgetown feeling quite alone. My Bestesty Friends taught me how to laugh again and cry again. I have loved again because of them. At the end of the day they make my life a better place. Recently I was having a very crappy day and one of these wonderful gals texted me about her crappy day and I realized that I no longer cared how horrible my day hap been. It didn't matter, but making my friend feel an ounce better well that did matter. And I realized right then, that is what true friendship is.

From left to right this is me, Amelia, and Christina. Amelia is getting married next Fall (crazy, huh?), and has the most amazing wedding dress picked out. She is always smiling, and my memories containing her are always the craziest. She is my wild child and she will always be my Sam and can whip my buy at word games. She makes me want to be better though.

Christina is my go to girl and fashionista. I have spent so much time laughing with her these last few months. I was so completely lost without her while she was studying abroad in Spain last year and I am so glad to have her back. She makes my life shine.

This is Cynthia. Its amazing that I only met her in September. I feel like I have known her forever. Maybe it is because she and I think on the same wave length, as she is a marketing major.
This is Pam and Luke. Pam and I became friends after we discovered that we had a similar interest... fanfiction. She ended up writing a paper at some point on the linguistics of fanfiction reviews, crazy huh? She is also smart. And is working at an up anc oming dot-com. Doing who knows what under a government contract. Luke, the crazy guy next to her is my tech guru and is an all around great guy. Some girl is going to be very lucky someday.

The picture below is a bunch of us are from Sophmore year. These were the good days, before our relationships became strained. We've all grown up so much since this picture. From L to R, me, Ashley Uno, Carol, Tessa, and Amelia. By the end of the year when this photo was taken, I was no longer on speaking terms with Uno or Tessa. I can't even explain for you why, its so trivial now.

I have been very fortunate to be able to repair my relationship with Uno. We were in the library on Sunday night, catching up and whispering until midnight, as if things had never changed. She will be a great doctor in the not so distant future.

I hope to be able to repair things with Tessa as well some day, I just need to pick up the phone and call. She is my secret keeper and she is one of the smartest people I have every met. Even with us not talking, I would do anything for her and I hope she knows that. If you thought I talked about sex loudly in public now, than you don't want to be around when the two of us are together. I blame this all on her, you know.

Carol, in the middle, is my political bunny, with a social concscience. She was born with a genetic abnormality and not expected to make it past kindergarden and look at her today. She has introduced me to the music and the arts and my life is richer because of her. The world is richer because of her.

Here we all are (sans Cynthia) freshman year, I can't believe that was 3 years ago. We all lived on the same floor and we all weighed 15 pounds less. I love this "Posse" and I feel so fortunate to be able to share my life with them and share in their lives.

Sex, Cookies, and Not Me Monday

2008-12-08T12:11:00.008-05:00

Surprisingly, this has been a good last week. I mean, there has been drama, but whose life (especially mine) doesn't.

While leaving the National Christmas Tree Lighting ceremony at the White House on Thursday, me and two of my bestesty girlfriends were not having a conversation about "intimate" relationships. I did not say, "I don't know what everyone's problem in the US is about sex, I mean they lose their virgintiy in Europe at like 14." As I say this, I suddenly realize where I was. I was so most definately not in a crowd of people that had stopped waiting to cross at the light. I did not meet the eye of a mom with her 12-13 year old daughter, and I so did not get a death glare.

I am really quiet in groups of people. I think I have always been shy, but when I am around friends and family I talk a mile a minute and pretty loudly too. I really get into it and I like that about myself, even if I am talking about sex.

My friend Cynthia did not proceed to point out that this is becoming a habit for me. Because a couple months ago we were not at Tombs, and I was not recounting my one and only conversation about sex with my parents. I was not saying, "I was like 15 and we were sitting at a traffic light and I don't remember how it came up, but my Mom asks, 'You know he puts it in you, right?'" Well I must not have been a little loud because the next thing I know people at the table next to us do not stop talking and do not all turn to look at me. Great. Great. Great. This mean I am now the girl who talks really loudly about sex in public.

My friend Christina made yummy, homemade enchiladas for dinner last night and I brought the desert. Well I actually made desert there.... I had to stop at Safeway to get cookie dough and was talking on the phone being passed around my family who were gathered at my house themselves partaking in a cookie making extravaganza. I was not so caught up in my conversation and not dropping the box I was carrying and getting all the buttons right on the debit-card swippy machine (why are there so many steps to those, btw?) that I so did not, not realize that one of my best friends was standing in line in front of me. It was so totally not until the guy handed me the receipt and I turned to leave that I realized she was standing right there and had been the entire time. ooops!

Well those were the big mea culpa's this week. But I am not without my small faults. Finally, I have not had three of these cookies for breakfast (I am justifying it by drinking a glass of OJ), they are not super easy, and fast, and they are so not delectably amazing. I did not get these off a blog I read... no not this blog right here.

I am am so not admiting that I posted this Not Me Monday over on my China Travel blog and it did not take me 10 minutes to realize it.

On another note I don't know what to do about a paper. I emailed my professor on Saturday morning about changing my paper topic, but he didn't get back to me. So I made an executive decision and took my paper in another direction. Well he emailed me this morning and pretty much told me not to change it. The probelem is that it is 50% of my grade... yes 50% OF MY GRADE! so off I go to figure out what to do.

Scrooge McDuck

2008-12-06T10:49:00.002-05:00

What is with these people? While in Ashville for the Thaksgiving holiday, a news story dominated the papers and local news. A man attacked his Grandfather with a machete knife after the grandfather wouldn't give him the money to bring his mail-order bride over from China. After attacking his elderly grandfather he stole $200,000 out of his grandfather's safe. Yes, you read the right 200,000 DOLLARS! 200,000 BUCKS! 200,000 SMACKAROOS!

What is striking about this to me, isn't the grandson using a machete (sadly the world isn't surprising in that regard), but that the grandfather would keep his life savings in his safe. Isn't he afraid its going to be robbed? Oh yeah, it was!

Then in Seattle today there is a story in the paper about a high-school student who turned in $10,000 he found in the bathroom at the Top Foods where he works. Good for the boy... but the article states that the 50 and 1o0 dollar bills represent the life savings of the man they were returned to. Again with someone having their life savings in cash, and carrying it around with him no less.

I just don't get these people. Have neither of these people not heard of a bank? You know if the money was in the bank, they wouldn't of had it stollen or lost it! ANd if you were afraid of the run on the banks, there is this wonderful thing called the FDIC that wasn't around during the great depressions, that miraculous insures the money FOR YOU!

Good news...

2008-12-05T17:32:00.003-05:00

...I've bought my ticket home for Christmas... I will actually leave on the 18th and will be home by 7pm... I can't wait.

...And my best friend is moving into my dorm next semester. INTO MY DORM. Oh goodness, we will never get anything done. I am sure there will be many late night chats next semester...

The lighting of the Christmas Trees!

2008-12-05T16:56:00.007-05:00

Classes are officially over! Yeah!!! I had to give my speech today instead of yesterday, as we ran out of time in class, and had a nice chat about me being tone deaf afterwards (a problem if you are speaking Chinese). I don't know how many times she corrected my pronuciation of the word for government... my tone was wrong on the fu part of zhengfu.... oh well it's done.

I spent the rest of the afternoon restringing the lights onto my Christmas tree... come on folks, I know I can be OCD, but I am not that OCD. The string of lights on the top 3rd of the tree would not light for some reason. Before the break I changed the fuses and replaced every light bulb, who knows what was wrong. But amazing enough there was a warantee on the tree so they mailed me a new string of lights... it looks decent enought but it took about an hour and a half! Yikes, I caught up on my tv shows so it wasn't all bad. I then proceeded to put up my ornaments. So our tree is all lit and happy now! Quite the production though. But alas... Tada!

In celebration of classes being complete. Last night we (me and two of my bestesty friends) went to the National Christmas Tree lighting ceremony at the White House. Most of it was sorta cheesey, it would have been better if they hadn't been trying to buildup the anticipation for Santa's arrival. The highlights... the fact that the President rode in his car the several hundred feet from the White House to the stage at the eclipse. That and when he finally got up to speak, he never said anything more than a laundry list of thank yous.... the entire thing was worth it when the button was pressed and the tree was lit. That and the carols at the end. I had forgotten how much fun it was to sing carols... so was it worth camping out for the tickets... the jury is still out.

Which has me thinking about my favorite Christmas songs... I have been playing Steven Curtis Chapman's "All I Want for Christmas" album for the last week or so... and it is good... but my favorite songs are "Go Tell it on the Mountain" (as sung by Karen Vanderwhite) and "We Three Kings (of Orient are)." Both of which I discovered during my years of Christmas Productions as a teenager.

So alas, it is time to say that the holiday time is finally here.

I never knew Sam and Toby had it so hard...

2008-12-04T02:55:00.005-05:00

I am tired...exhausted really. It is afterall 3am... but I am currently working on a speech I have to give for Chinese class tomorrow and I can't seem to write it... so time keeps ticking by and I am not getting anywhere. At some point the staying up and working starts having deminishing returns and I think I am nearing that point. I am contemplating finishing re-reading the chapter on marriage trends and then going to bed for a couple hours... hopefully I will get finished with enough time to practice some before I have to present at one this afternoon.

A Rant on the the appropriateness of text messaging...

2008-12-02T12:17:00.005-05:00

So some things are appropriate for text messaging... where are you in the library... i just saw the guy I have a crush on... you want to grab coffee in an hour... i'm running late, still 10 min away... and the like.

For most things text messaging serves a great purpose, so I am glad my father has joined us in this wonderful world of technology. But texting me today to tell me he is worried about my cat, who btw is almost 15, and not providing me with anymore details... I am so not with that.

UPDATE: After many a text message back and forth and finally a phone call, I received yet another text message this morning that simply stated "Princess is doing better."

Jeff the Pinkish-Purplish Unicorn

2008-12-01T21:25:00.011-05:00

I had a great conversation this evening with my brother... I don't think anything serious was said in the least, but it was heart lifting to say the least. I laughed more in our 20 minutes than I think I have all month! Apparently he "flew" to DC over the break and left me a purple Unicorn named Jeff in the closet of my dorm room. Apparently Jeff is gender confused... she was once a pink unicorn, but now she has taken on some blue tint and prefers the name Jeff... I'll just have to honor her, I mean his, request. I hope my hall director doesn't have a problem with it...

There was also discussion about a Christmas present for his girlfriend, and as his big sister I am happy to advise. My lips are sealed though... really they are sealed. All that I can say is that my advise did involve this video I spotted earlier today... the video is great... go on... go watch.

Check... check... check!

2008-11-30T23:48:00.008-05:00

Friends

Turkey and trimings

Sappy Christmas movies

Fires burning in the Fireplace

Getting my ass kicked at boggle

Christmas carols playing on iTunes

Walking in the North Carolina woods

five splended days away from campus

enjoying the wonderful home-cooked meals

Marveling at the amazing Gingerbread houses

Beating my old-roommate at scrabble for once

Enjoying houses decorated with christmas lights

a dorm room lite by the light from the christmas tree

curlying up in bed with tea and Tedz

A content holiday break....

check, check, check!

"Not Me!" Monday

2008-11-24T03:18:00.010-05:00

It's once again time for MckMama's "Not Me!" Mondays....

No this is not my 49th post, this number does not equate to the number of posts I wrote while in China. No this does not feel monumental in the slightest!

I did not have to accept a urn with ashes in it, while babysitting on Friday night. That would be just weird... really, really, really creepy actually. So no, it was not me that signed for it. And I do not hate, hate, hate the word ashes. I have not hated it my entire life, and I did not detest the song "Ring around the rosie" as a child because "ashes. ashes. we all fall down." It so has nothing to do with my name.

Christina and I absolutely did not take a study break and visit Georgetown Cupcakes tonight. We did not spend $3.03 each on a sugary concoction that we had to wait in line for a half hour for. The were definalty, so not worth every minute of the wait. We did not order a dozen to take with us to our friend's parents for Thanksgiving. We so didn't order an additional half dozen, because we knew we would be too tempted to eat them on the eight hour car ride there. And while ordering online I did not find overwhelming joy in playing with my mouse and making lots of swirling cupcakes.... come on you know you want to check it out.

No the back wheel and seat were not stollen off my bike this week. Nobody would do that, because that is mean and petty. Literally. I did not have to file a police report and I am not going to have to replace them out of pocket. No, it does not make me feel sad at the circumstances of despiration this person must have been in, to need my seat and wheel so badly, because stelling is just plain wrong. And I did not tear up when the six year old I was babysitting this weekend asked with heartfelt sincerity "why would someone stell your stuff?"

I did not lose a ring this week that was a gift given to me by my Aunt whom I adore. I did not look in the library, the tombs, cafeteria, etc... for the ring and come up empty. I did not proceed to find it sitting on my desk Saturday night. It was not just sitting there and had been all along, because my roomate really did not find it. I asked.

I did not 5 minutes later realize that I had lost my GoCard. A piece of plastic that lets me into the dorm, into the library, oh yeah, and feeds me. I did not look everywhere for it. I did not finally figure that I must have thrown it out with the trash I had dumped the night before. I did not get an email on Sunday evening 24 hours later that the Faculty-in-Resident's wife found it. I did not breathe a huge sigh of relief.

No I am not just having "one of those weeks." No I did not slam my numb fingers into the door last night and I did not almost pass out in the elevator when I realized these was blood gushing everywhere. Seriously, it has not been "one of those weeks."

I was not kicked out of the library earlier tonight, because I didn't have my GoCard. No, I didn't whine to the security guard in the process. Whining is for babies and surely I am not a baby. I did not trudge back to the dorm to get my GoCard from the Faculty-in-Resident's apartment. It is absolutely not 3:30 in the morning and I am definately not back in the library, writing this.

Speaking of late nights, no I did not pull 3 all nighters this last week. One would be acceptable, two on the line of crazy... so three... surely not me. The amount of time I slept saturday night did not equate to the amount of sleep I had had in the last seven days. That would be really bad.

So I am totally not going to head to my room and go to bed now... night all!

And for anyone who stops by to read via MckMama, would you please take a moment to watch one of the two videos here about my friend Sergent Rodney Spears. Then if you pray, pray for this family. If not would you consider making a blood donation in his name? It has taken over 40 units of blood to keep him alive... would you consider helping your fellow mankind at this time of Thanksgiving?

Because we could all use a laugh!

2008-11-19T23:24:00.004-05:00

Man in Australia
attempts to pay
bill with spider
drawing...
click here to read.

Winter is coming...

2008-11-17T22:08:00.008-05:00

Tonight leaves crunched under my feet as I walked across Copley lawn, the air was nippy and I was filled with anticipation - The Weather Channel said there was a chance of the winter's first flakes tonight - winter is officially on the way. Heading out the door I have started to instincitvely grab a scarf without thinking, soon a hat and mittens will follow. I am excitted winter is coming...

...and with winter comes the start of my beloved Hoya's basketball season. Tonight was the first game of the year, and sadly I was not in attendance. However, I spent the evening watching the game at The Tombs with my bff, eating the most wonderful chili and savoring this time in my life. Oh yeah, and we won 71-62 against Jacksonville. Life doesn't get any sweeter than this. Did I mention, winter is coming..

"Not Me!" Mondays

2008-11-17T11:12:00.008-05:00

Time for MckMama's "Not Me!" Monday again...

No I did not literally run through the streets of Georgetown to get to the bank on Tuesday before they closed at 5. No I did not arrive at 4:55 and when the doors were locked, I did not jingle the door really hard. No I did not call my dad to vent that the bank closed early to spite me. No I did not feel self-absorbed when he informed me it was Veteran's Day. No I still don't understand why we had to go to school, when the banks were closed.

I did not proceed to go to Starbucks and walk through Pottery Barn and look at the Christmas displays so my trip to Wisconsin/M Street would not be a total loss.

I did not see a cockroach in the bathroom in the middle of the night. No he wasn't a little guy less than an inch long. Nonetheless, it did not bring up memories of past bug problems. And no I did not have an epiphany while sitting on the porcelain thrown that unless I killed the thing right then and there, I would never use the bathroom closest to my room again. I did not immediately return to my room without washing my hands to get the ant/roach killer and proceed to drown the thing. Afterwards I did not have a mighty sense of satisfaction.

I did not roll out of bed Thursday morning and step on my glasses, breaking them. I did not proceed to tear a contact lens two minutes later. I did not walk around campus blind in one eye half the morning and I did not deem going to the optician more important that going to class. (By the way My Eye Doctor on M Street rocks the socks off customer service, if you are looking for a optometrist office in DC).

I did not spend the last two months planning a trip to Atlantic City for four of my friends. We did not have to reschedule this trip twice in the process. No I was not angry/disappointed/mad when three of my friends bailed within 24 hours of us leaving. No, my friends are not inconsiderate, and no two did not bail via text messaging.

As I picked up the friend at work whose car I borrowed to take us to Atlantic City, I did not resent my friends for every one of the 120 minutes I had to spend in DC traffic as a result.

No I did not consider tossing her GPS out the window, because it wanted me to turn back into the traffic I had just come from. No I do not consider myself a better navigator than the GPS.

I was not so disappointed/exhausted from the day that when we got back to her place, I did not fall asleep while watching a movie while waiting for Chinese food. I did not wake up to eat and proceed to fall back asleep. No I am not such a bad house guest. No I did not return home to promptly go to bed, cause if my trip was canceled I just didn't want to do anything else.

I did not read three whole books in their entirety this weekend that would mean that I was actually productive and studying, and seriously that just hasn't been me lately. I did not start to write a paper on Saturday that is due Thursday, that would be planning ahead. No aliens have not possessed my body.

I did not feel momentarily guilty this morning when I woke up to see my roommate already awake, even though I went to bed 3 hours later than her. Waking up in the morning is not a contest.

Machiavelli's Prince in the White House?

2008-11-13T02:36:00.017-05:00

We're discussing Machiavelli's "The Prince" in my World History class. It is not the first time I have endured this work of philosophy, which is probably the reason that my brain is off in left-field wondering: did Bush ever read it? has Obama? I am pretty sure the later would have sometime on his way to or passing through Harvard, not quite sure about the former though.

This actually seems fitting, Bush just never got that he had to appear to the world as a (virtuous) man and yet actually be the beast. But it is a thin line as Machiavelli explains, the prince cannot be cruel to the point of fear or hatred (the point Bush eventually reached with US action in Afghanistan or Iraq, if you were wondering), instead one must use cruelty to derive absolute respect instead through complimenting it with humanity and prudence. At his post-September 11th height, Bush was seen with absolute respect because he was able to not only look cruelly upon those who served to do the country harm, but still act with humanity towards the people of the state and our allies in the world.

Machiavelli also speaks about generosity on the part of the prince, which for some reason made me think of taxes. The thing Bush forgot, and most republicans too, is that if one is too overly generous, then the subject loses all appreciation and will turn to greed. "Lower Taxes! Lower Taxes! the populous will keep demanding. In being overly generous the prince exhausts resources which in the long run not only makes taxes be raised in the long term (national debt ringing a bell?), but causes grief which leads to hatred and hatred is the one thing that Machiavelli says the prince should stay clear from. That would seem to explain why Bush has an approximately 20% approval rating, even though he lowered taxes. Wise princes should be more willing to be labeled as ungenerous, then to be hated for trying to be too generous argued Machiavelli. I know that Obama had to propose tax cuts to beat McCain, but it makes me wonder what more people will demand in 2012.

Unlike Aristotle who saw virtue as derivative of the highest good, Machiavelli attacks the argument that virtuous action be in all behaviors. For this metaphysical approach to politics is inconsistent with reality. Virtue, Machiavelli argues, is abstract and does not concern itself with consequences. An Machiavellian virtue is one that is only a virtue in so far that it is praised by man as being virtuous. Understanding this, Machiavelli's view becomes a little more realistic.

But this is where I break with Machiavelli's argument. His view of human nature is that man is "ungrateful, fickle, false, cowardly, and covetous." Further, by nature men are deceitful and untrustworthy, they break promises, and are impressed only by appearances and results. So while man may respect and even praise virtue most men, however, do not possess it themselves. This view of human nature is important because it underlies all of Machiavelli's suggestions for princely actions. For if the populace were intelligent (I like to think I am, after all here I am blogging about Machiavelli and modern day politics) well-educated, and aware of history, the prince would be unable to affect public opinion, which is integral to the prince's successful leadership. For Machiavelli's suggestions about princely behavior to be beneficial the prince must be smarter than all the people.

Which in a round about way gets me back to modern day politics. Bush just wasn't smart enough to be president. Really the Bush-Palin SNL skit said it when it satired Bush saying "the office of vice-president is the most important office in the land...the president can do nothing without checking with the vice-president first." The skit was funny because it was true. In Machiavelli's terms Cheney was Bush's beast, ironically the prince was afraid of him because he had no control over said beast (UN Security council & Iraq anyone?). Obama on the other hand is smart, I think he is probably a lot smarter than most people give him credit for and that says a lot, because he is probably one of the most brilliant minds of his generation. We have seen him as the man, the consummate politician but the question comes does he have the beast inside him? And surely he will need that beast to accomplish anything in this town. Yet with 24 hour cable news as the mind of the populous, I don't know whether Obama would surpass. For what the media lacks in intelligence they make up for with tenacity, catchy phases, spiffy graphics. talking heads, and hologram technology.

It's the little things...

2008-11-11T16:15:00.008-05:00

"If we don't get to all the lectures this semester we'll blame it on Barney." This quote comes curtosey of Professor Wall following powerpoint going absolutely nuts after he tried to play a clip of the purple dinosaur singing Ring Around the Rosie during today's lecture on the Black Plague.

"Not Me!" Monday

2008-11-10T11:10:00.009-05:00

Several, several weeks back I stumbled upon MckMama's blog. She just had her fourth baby, Stellen, who was miraculously healed of a heart condition in utero. Anyways she does a weekly meme so I thought I would participate this week. So without delay, here is an honest portrayl of my week:

I did not wear my slippers to class on Tuesday because they were so soft inside and I was too comfortable, no that was not me. And it wasn't because I didn't have any clean socks that I wore them to class again on Wednesday. I did not justify it by saying they looked similar to loafers. No I did not, that would just be tacky.

My motivation for doing laundry this week was not because I ran out of clothes. And I do not mean by this that I ran out of the outfits that I like, but even the ones that I don't really like at all. So no I was not excited when pants I had ordered online arrived on Tuesday which meant I could hold off a couple more days before doing laundry. And no when I finally got around to doing laundry on Thursday did I not have to do 4 loads. 4 loads in not a major sign of procrastination, and no I am not a procrastinator at all that word would never describe me, never.

I was not wearing a new pair of pants while doing laundry on Thursday, because I didn't have any other clean pants to wear. I did not wear said pair of jeans to Carol's birthday on Sunday, even though I had not washed them yet. The tag did not say that they were made with a special dye and may bleed until washed. No I did not ignore that tag, because I thought they made my butt look nice. I did not sit on my hands at the party and silently freek out when I looked down at my hands and they were blue. My hands were not blue, oh no they weren't.

I did not spend Friday night in my room, watching movies and sorta studying Chinese. No that would be a pathetic way to spend a Friday night for a college student. I did not start another movie at 2, and not go to bed until 4. No I would never stay up that late when I had to be up at 9 the next morning.

I did not go to the Iron Chef competition on Saturday alone when I could not get ahold of the friend I had planned to go with. Going alone to an event is pathetic, and I did not go anyways because there was someone that I have a crush on there.

I was not a little relieved that said friend didn't show up because then I could stay home and not go clubbing. I did not go grocery shopping on Saturday night at 10 o'clock instead. That was not me at Safeway, because grocery shopping on Saturday night is so not more pathetic that watching a movie alone for two nights in a row.

I did not walk the mile to Safeway and back alone, no that is just not safe at 11 at night. I did not call my father on the way there and my mother on the way home, because I knew it was not entirely safe and figured they could call the police if they heard screaming in the background of the call.

I was not relieved when my father told me on said call that he finally severed the relationship with his ex-girlfriend. No I did not cringe everytime my father had previously mentioned getting together with her since she broke up with him in September. No I am a supportive daughter who was not thinking "I told you so," when it turned out she was a bit crazy. And no I did not invite my friends to go out for drinks when she dumped him.

And when a friend said she would be coming over in 20 minutes Saturday night, I did not get caught up in other things and no it was not an hour and a half later that I finally realized she hadn't shown up. No I did not have any guilt over this when I could not get a hold of her the next day. And no it was not almost 9 on Sunday night when I walked down to her room, to see if anyone had seen her. No thoughts of the intro scene to a CSI like show were playing through my head as I walked down. And when she was not there did I not put my ear to her door and call her to see if her phone was in her room. That is just crazy stalkerish and I am not a stalker.

I did not search every common room in the building looking for a can openner on Sunday morning, because I did not buy cans not thinking through the fact that I could not open them. My can openner is not in a basement in Bethesda, it is not still there in one of 12 boxes that I have not promised to go through but because I am lazy and don't want to waste a precious weekend day I have still not done it.

I did not combine the vegetarian beans I bought specificially so a vegetarian friend could eat my dish at a potluck, with the turkey I had browned. I did not do it because it seemed logical, because I only had two tuperware containers, forgetting that this friend was going to be there. No I did not forget about her, she's one of my best friends. That would be just mean.

I did not eat three servings of my own dish at the party because it was just that good. And I did not eat hte leftover taco casserole I brought home for dinner last night, AND I did not finish it this morning for breakfast instead of walking down to the cafeteria. I would never eat the same thing for three meals in a row. Never would that happen, as that would be just lazy, and my laziness did not cause me to pull the tupperware out of the fridge and eat it this morning cold because I was not too lazy to walk down the hall to the microwave, no that would be entirely way too lazy and I am not lazy.

I did not make a cup of tea last night to help me stay up and study, then forget about the tea when I feel asleep. I did not microwave the same cup of tea this morning and I am not drinking that cup of tea now. I did not think oh well, when it didn't have its pungent wonderful aroma.

I am not thinking of just throwing my hair into a ponytail because I wrote this in the time alotted for my shower. No I do not have reading still to do for my class at 2, and it is 12:30 now. No I would never leave reading until the last minute like that. No not me I am a perfect student.

Did you vote today?

2008-11-04T17:33:00.004-05:00

Technically I voted Saturday, but I just wanted to say that no matter who you vote for make sure you vote.

Urban Camping

2008-11-01T08:43:00.006-04:00

So this morning, and by morning I mean middle of the night. A group of us from Georgetown camped out for tickets to see the National Tree Lighting Ceremony. 2400 free tickets are distributed to 600 individuals on a first come, first served basis at 8am on the first Saturday of November every year. We arrived on the Elipse near the White House visitor center between 2:30 and 3:00, with some food and blankets and popped a squat on the nice cold, hard cement. We received badges to mark our place in line, mine was number 108. It wasn't long before the night before caught up with us all and we hunkered down to get some sleep. It was very, very cold. After arriving home, I checked, and it was 41*F. I got a couple hours of sleep cuddling together with others to keep warm and woke about 7 with my toes almost numb. The view was amazing. In front of us was the Washington Monument and the National Christmas Tree which will be lit at the ceremony in December and behind us the White House. Finally after 8 am we received our tickets and headed back to campus, but not before seeing the yellow morning sunlight illuminating the capital.

Pictures from Halloween!

2008-11-01T00:35:00.005-04:00

I had quite the unusual Halloween. I forewent partying with my friends, and instead went trick-or-treating with my 6 year old Star Wars pal. If you know me, then you most likely know who the handsome guy is below, if not, then I am going to opt to keep his identity on the DL. After we hit all the houses in walking distance Mr. Handsome and his friend's that went with us had quite the loot.

I then took off to go see a concert at the Strathmore up the road. The building is just beautiful and the acoustics were wonderful. The show called "The United" tour brings together Steven Curtis Chapman and Michael W. Smith and was definitely worth seeing. The two gentlemen are at the top of the Christian recording world. I have a special connection to SCC as I have mentioned before, and with everything going on with Nate, talk about a heart moving concert.

Hope you had a good Halloween!

When at Home...

2008-10-24T15:02:00.007-04:00

Various photos taken at home (or at least on the way). The first photo is connecting through Newark at a very early hour! See the empire state building in the background? I am so excited to make my third ever trip to New York in December, more in the coming weeks.

This is my house! Before we bought it , is was a drug house and you couldn't even see it from the street. Oh the number of trees that were removed, but now it is prettiful!Here are all of Nate's friends getting photos taken before homecoming. A real glimmer of hope in a dark and trying time. They figured they would save the 20 bucks and have their friend Abby taken them instead of buying the professional photos at the homecoming dance. The kiddos all arrived back at the house about 12:30 and some where still there at 5! By the way, the Redmond football team won the homecoming game!

My puppy, who is 18 months, and still thinks that he is a puppy, even though when standing on his hind legs he is particually my height! Here he is watching all the party goers out front and feeling very leftout!

Nate and I carved a pumpkin while home. Before being de-gutted it weighed in at 103 lbs and 43 inches around! When we were kids we used to do these elaborately carved genormous pumpkins, my dad would carve them with a jigsaw! We did his one with a serrated knife. Good memories, our neighborhood would go all out for Halloween, haunted houses and king sized candy bars! Again good memories.

Ashley is...

2008-10-15T22:53:00.006-04:00

9:29 - blogging from the 3rd and final presidential debate of the 2008 election season. Only 20 more days to the election. Doesn't it seem like it was just Iowa primary season?
9:30 - not going to be appologetic for expressing her opinion in the following posts... if you don't like them, stop reading.
9:32 - thinking that McCain looks like a turtle peaking out of his shell at the economy!
9:34 - thinking that from McCain's statement about being proud of the people at his ralleys that he supports every right wing conservative nut job in the nation.
9:36 - thinking McCain just made Obama's argument for him in calling Ayers a "washed up terrorist" isn't Ayers just that washed up. Additionally don't we all deserve a second chance in life.
9:40 - thinking Obama's response to Ayers and Acorn was articulate and spun fantastically into an issue of working across the aisle. If you want to criticize me with my relationship to this man, then you are going to need to criticize your fellow republicans as well. Then he turned it into how this man will not be advising him in office, but he will depend on the experts in their fields, both those on either side of the aisle. Again, great well scripted answer.
9:42 - loving Bob 'the Moderator' Schieffer for his question on why the candidates chose their VP,but Obama's answer is weak, but I am holding my breath for McCain's response. After Obama did not take the opportunity to opening criticize Palin, McCain has the gull to go after Biden, a man who has said he has been proud to have worked with McCain in the past. This may come back to haunt McCain, it showed his desperation.
9:46 - saying Palin is NOT my role model and I am a woman!
9:49 - wondering after McCain's arguement about Nuclear power being safe if McCain will invite power companies to build Nuclear Power Plants next to ever one of his how many houses! I sure as heck don't want one near where I live. Chernobyl anyone? It may be safe 99.99% of the time, but it is that .01 percent that scares the shit out of me.
9:49 - if you hadn't realized it, I think I am going to vote Obama.
9:50 - wondering why we need oil or nuclear power when we could depend on green energies. Obama, McCain, where are the fuel standards? where is the money for R & D?
9:53 - curious what we are importing from Columbia... cocaine?
9:56 - psyched the question is back on econ!!! Poor, Poor McCain, are you going to go hide back in your turtle shell?
9:58 - OT - my absentee ballot came today. I am going to vote are you?
10:04 - agreeing with Carol, is the 3rd Presidential Debate presented by Joe the Plumber''s Plumbing Business, from middle of nowhere, USA. Joe doesn't need the government's help any more, after all the references to him during the debate, he'll never need to advertise again. BTW, you can visit his website at www.joetheplumber.com, lol!
10:05 - Does the average healthcare package cost 5,800 or 12,800 dollars, there is a big difference. And anyways if McCain is only giving american 5,000 doesn't that mean that 800 is coming out of our pockets. Apparently McCain can't add. Maybe he is a product of the American education system that he doesn't seem to want to fix.
10:06 - OT- worried about the Dodgers, who are losing against the Phillies 5-0.
10:08 - wondering which congressman planted a bomb in Congress as according to McCain it almost "exploded" back when they were looking at Supreme Court Nominees?
10:11 - and has believed that it is not the governments place to legislate the abortion issue. End of issue. Period.
10:13 - thinking you should go look at Christina's update on McCain being left-handed. Christina's comment, "Tina noticed that McCain is lefthanded, according to Ethiopian beliefs, he's evil"
10:16 - pointing out the stupidity in the idea that you make abortion illegal and then not provide education on the consequences of having sex or their access to birth control and contreceptives. And does anyone want to point out that historically in America there has been a direct corelation between the legalization of abortion and lower crime rates. And anyways, people are going to have abortions anyways, its going to happen. So why don't we make it safe for all parties involved.
10:18 - would take Obama's $4,000 college tax credit. Too bad it would be a year late. McCain how much will you give me? oh none? Really?!
10:21 - saying that putting money into charter schools takes money out of public schools and I don't think we should give up on public schools for everyone. Charter schools drain resources and the best teachers. IMHO, the governement should pay off loans for students who go on to teach, and pay for or provide grants for master's program and professional development training.
10:23 - OT - currenlty watching the debate from Leo's at the most amazing free dinner event. Thanks Georgetown, there is a reason that this school is one of the best government programs in the nation! Go Hoyas!
10:25 - thinking the DC school district isn't an issue of charter schools but an issue of Socio-economic problems and disparities. Bad example McCain.
10:27 - OT - loving her facebook feature on her Blackberry. This is really fun.
10:29 - wondering if McCain voted to pass the DC budget, if so he voted for vouchers for schools. According to his argument he has been using against Obama voting for the bill is supporting... so McCain are you for or against voucher programs? Bills are complicated things, they are christmas trees that get weighed down. It is the cost of doing business, can't we just acknowledge it and move it.
10:30 - finding the closing arguments to be dull in comparison to the debate. Obama's was articulate and I loved his promise at the end. Just found out, no teleprompters used, the candidate's relied on good old memorization baby!
10:32 - thinking this was the best of the three debates, by far. So who do you think won?
10:37 - we took a vote, 3-0 Obama wins. But then again we are educated liberal elites. Oh yeah and we are women, 2 of which are hispanic.... go figure?!
10:39 - Hope you enjoyed this... and remember No matter who you vote for, Make sure you vote on November 4th. Good night and God Bless.

Morality Reflected

2008-10-13T17:10:00.006-04:00

Life has been busy for the last month. For some reason I thought that not returning to work part-time this semester would some how make my life easier, but I feel like I am running a thousands miles an hour all day and not having the time to finish all on my to do list. Maybe because I am not working, perhaps I am so much harder on myself when I do not get everything completed. Maybe I don't allow myself the grace that I deserve.

I was moaning and complaining about being too busy and time passing too fast. Then life came along and hit me like a sack of potatoes. I talked a couple weeks ago about how I was seeing my own mortality in the reflection of the world's. But then God called my bluff. I got that middle of the night call that brings one's world crashing down around them. I saw my morality reflected in my own life. My brother was involved in an accident, and suddenly the world became about police investigations, and state law, and was he in the wrong, and why was there a pedestrian standing in the street, why was this happening to my little brother, and why was it happening to our family. I don't know and that kills me.

Do you ever feel like your life turned out wrong? Perhaps you took this wrong turn somewhere along the way. Like this parallel universe is occurring and the world there keeps turning and yet here you sit in a world completely different. I can't shake the feeling that my life is wrong, and is not how it should be. I can't turn back time, so how do I make it right?

UPDATE: I posted this and not five minutes later I came across this on another blog:

"Count it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance." - James 1:2-3

That's the WHY! Isn't it? I know it and yet I hate it, too.

Extreme Dorm Makeover!

2008-10-01T11:04:00.006-04:00

So last night at about 11pm inspiration struck my roommate and I as we began to discuss how we could move around our room. Our room is a very awkward shape, and we have a lot of furniture to accommodate: two beds (bunkable), a futon, two side tables, two dressers, a fridge,
two desks with accompanying hutches and chairs. After the inspiration struck we started moving around furniture, and really the only place we got was making a mess!

Then in the process of moving our fridge, we pulled the door off (okay I did, and it was an accident) but we laughed so hard. Looked at each other and just left it to deal with later. And we move the room around some more, if you'll notice the futon has found a home outside of the picture. But a calamity was about to happen when my roommate (S) seen below, knocked over her hutch and sent a 300 piece set of plastic silverware flying!

Four hours later... Tada! Doesn't it look like something out of an Ikea catalogue? Wait, everything but my China painting and the hutches hiding in the back are from Ikea. Who'd of thunk?

Me enjoying a nice break on the couch, after it was all done.

My roommate on her bed enjoying the break too!The dressing alcove!From another angle. Our desks. Yes, it took us hours, but not until first light. We went to bed about 3:30 and this photo was taken this morning. If you can't tell my desk is the one on the right.And last but not least, Stringbean says hi! He had quite the busy night and I am sure he wasn't happy, but he has more sunlight now in our new room. I bet he loves it as much as we do.

Finally (and just for my mom) the layout before and after... I can't tell you what a difference it makes, it really feels like being in a completely different room. It almost makes you believe in Fengshui. And by the way we did end up getting our fridge put back together.

That faitful decision....

2008-09-22T12:33:00.006-04:00

I don't know when I decided to not vote for McCain. Oh yeah, it was right about the moment that he chose Sarah Palin as his running mate. That was the last straw, well actually it was in the 3rd debate when he called Palin the role model for every woman in America. Personally I took great offense to that, particularly after the interview with Katie. And the pundits say that people don't vote based off of the VP slot... yeah right!

A year ago, before Iowa, when he was just a senator and not a presidential candidate I would have voted for him. Now not so much. Somewhere over the last year, in order to win the election, McCain lost his balls. I don't agree for a minute that he is "The Maverick." In this election he tucked his tail between his legs as he ran from the moderate to the right. Every word he says is aimed at pleasing his home base. For me the choice of Palin for Vp epitomized this campaign strategy. I don't doubt that someone in his campaign feared that if he alienated the base they wouldn't show up on election day, and with Obama's growing popularity (new voter alone would overwhelm McCain) it was decided that it was no longer a race of ideas, but a game of numbers and getting people to the polls. Sadly, I think after her performance more people came to the polls anti-Palin then for her.

Why I voted for Obama is an entirely different story.

Yet another Sunday...

2008-09-22T04:19:00.001-04:00

Well a whole week has passed and I assure you that I will share some of the stories from this week, because really I don't want you to think I am too dull when you read what I say next. But I one again spent Sunday night in the library, slowly as the hours have passed in the blury realm between Sunday and Monday the library has slowly emptied. It is now on the verge of being Monday morning, and seven of us remain in our little corner or the library. I have my fingers crossed that I will have time for a nap before my classes start in a couple hours, we'll see if it happens.

The Most Excitting Sunday Night Ever!

2008-09-14T20:34:00.001-04:00

Where else would a college student spend a Sunday night, but at the library studying? I'm a couple days behind in my blog posting hopefully I will have some time this week to catch up. Hope you all had a good weekend.

Georgetown Football Update

2008-09-14T13:01:00.002-04:00

Sadly, Georgetown lost our game against Layfette last night, but we're still proud of you! To read the recap click here. But we're still 1-1 and that is one more win already than last season.

Hoya Football and ESPN's Bill Simmons

2008-09-13T14:17:00.000-04:00

Its not uncommon for Georgetown to make an ESPN.com blog, story, or on-air commentary.
In his latest column on ESPN.com, Bill Simmons when speaking about New England Patriots chances without the injured Tom Brady invoked the image of Georgetown.

One might hope he said something about the strength of the b-ball team last year without Jeff Greene and show a little love to the Hoyas, but no... Simmons wrote that the fourth of the five silver lining is that “Brady or no Brady, the Patriots have the easiest schedule in the league — the NFL did everything but schedule Georgetown and Columbia in December for them." Then he goes on to say "...this might be a good thing, right? Um … right? (Oh, who am I kidding? We're screwed. I will now attempt to hang myself with my Wes Welker jersey.)" So not only do we get slammed once we get slammed twice.

Though if Simmons often invoked Ewing (Georgetown basketball legend) Theory holds, he really shouldn't need to worry. After all his New England Patriots (he's a Boston Boy) won Super Bowl XXXVI after an injury to Drew Bledsoe forced Tom Brady into the starting quarterback's role in 2001. BTW, I blatently stole that from Wikipedia I know absolutely nothing about football besides the which I could gleem from my many lunches with Jeff and Chris at work last year.

Ewing Theory aside, I take offense at Simmon's bilittling characterization of the GT Football program. Granted our football team ended last in our league last year - actually we didn't even win a game last season - but our team with a string of defeats behind them strode out onto the field week after week and they walked off the field with their head equally held high after every loss. But it is one thing for fellow Hoya's to non-chilantly joke about our team - in a recent online poll 60% of 108 voters on The Hoya website said that they "still don't care" when asked if After the football team's win on Sunday, are you more likely to attend games? - it is another for Bill Simmons to do it on a blog read by millions.

I whole heartedly agree with what was written in the Hoya yesterday, "Don't think for a second that the Hoyas care about any of it." Because Simmons comments aside, I am proud of our football team. And granted the Patriot League is not in contention with the Pac-10 or Big-10. But I would like to point out for the record that Georgetown Hoya's football team beat Howard last Saturday (for an intramural DC cup). Okay Howard is no Notre Dame or Michigan State, they are no Ohio or Florida State, but we are currently UNDEFEATED for the year! And currently sport the same win-loss record as Simmon's beloved Patriots... 1-0 BABY!

Congratulations team, and good luck as you kick off the season tonight in your game at Layfette, even though I am not there rooting you on, know win or lose we still love you!

I read this on a blog today...

2008-09-07T14:30:00.000-04:00

God knows our days, our hours and our minutes. He doesn't waste one, nor does He cut them short. He's never early, nor late--for there is no rush in eternity. He does all things in the perfect fullness of time.

Club Rain at Leavey Esplanade

2008-09-06T03:20:00.002-04:00

Tonight was the inaugural event of Class of 2009 Senior Dis-Orientation. It was suppose to be a party on Leavey Esplanade, and while today was gorgeous the front of Hurricane Hannah began moving in, and it quickly became a club like atmosphere straight out of Las Vegas. And the best parts, good friends, and no cover charges and we ended the night with Philly's Pizza Delivery.

My morality has hit me.

2008-09-05T18:19:00.000-04:00

I commented the other day on the sad news coming out of Georgetown that it appears we have lost one of our fellow Hoyas. As I was sitting and reflecting today I thought about the loss that I have been touched with in my community and my virtual community and find the quantity astounding. And more importantly how deeply it has affected my view of the world, once the shock has worn off.

On May 21st, the Chapman family (of Steven Curtis Chapman, Christian recording artist fame) lost their youngest daughter Maria Sue in a horrible and tragic driveway accident. I first met this family shortly after they adopted for the first time in 2001 and for the last 9 months have followed Mary Beth's (the Mom's) blog where I got to know her 6 children through antidotes, stories, and photos. When I heard the news I think I stopped breathing for a moment. For months Maria has never been far from my mind.

It was the Chapman family that first really opened my eyes to Chinese orphans. And it was through a long and winding road that I came to know sweet Anna. Anna is a special needs child and during a routine catheter, as part of repairing her special need, a wire knicked a vein. She fought long and hard but it was not enough. Anna went home to heaven last week to her forever home after being with her forever family for 8 all to short weeks. Anna and Maria peacefully lie near each other in Franklin, TN.

It is through another family with twin girls from China, that I came to know Stephanie. Nie, as she is know, is the mother to four kids aged one to six and her love of her children, husband, and for being a mother is apparent in her blog. As one blogger said, "She has a true beauty of spirit that shines though every smile for the camera and every word she so lovingly writes about her family." In the second week of August, Nie and her husband Christian were riding in a plane with his flight instructor when the plane went down in Arizona. Both are currently in the hospital with burns on 80% and 30% of their bodies respectively, both are in chemically induced comas.

Also in the hospital in the past several months are two family friends. Whom we will call Big J and Mighty R. Big J suffered multiple strokes and since he had no health insurance the hospital stopped treating him. But in a catch twenty-two he can't leave the hospital ($2,000 a day cost) without improving, but they won't give him the care he needs so he could get better and leave. My dad fought for him and he was eventually released from the hospital. Big J refused physical therapy and other follow up care and I learned this evening he has lost the use of one of his arms. Big J fills my childhood memories and it hurts me that he is so alone in the world, that his world is spiraling further and further out of his grasp.

Meanwhile I arrived home from China to hear that Mighty R's pancreas surgery had complications and he was still in the hospital fighting an infection. Mighty R was diagnosed with terminal cancer nearly a decade ago and they thought they had beat it. On the plus side Mighty R had insurance, but when his million dollar cap was reached and Mighty R's disposition turned for the worse, both he and the hospital gave up. His girlfriend fought on his behalf and the hospital relented and put in a trakea within days he had improved to the point of the hospital discharging him today! I rejoice in the Lord, Mighty R walked beside me in a time when I felt utterly alone in the world. And he showed me that it was not my fault that I walked this solitary path, but that there was something wrong with a world that had put me on it. I rejoice.

I shared with you Terrance's story briefly. But what I didn't include is Terrance, no matter if he is at home, or school, or in a foreign country, a dorm, Laungier Library, or on the altar of the church singing his heart out, Terrance lives his life with zeal, as if he must brand this life as Terrance's. And he does so with his heart firmly pointed towards Jesus. Terrance gives all of himself every day. If he is no longer here on earth (which I continue to pray is not the case), he is safely in the hands of The Protector and His Creator.

Nie and Christian continue to fight, but an entire blogging community is fighting on their behalf. Currently 300 different bloggers are running silent auctions through the comments section of their sites. All proceeds go to the family's recovery fund. I am amazed time and time again at what the virtual community continues to do for them.

Maria Sue lived her life with zeal. On the day after Maria's death and over the weeks to come, as Jim Houser Steven's Manager said, the world showed up. So much so that three months later over 600,000 dollars has been donated to Maria's Miracle Fund at the Chapman family adoption charity, Shaohannah's Hope. Enough money to begin building Maria's Big House of Hope, a living and treatment facility in Laoyang for abandoned special-needs Chinese children. This family has now been featured in People magazine 3 times and have appeared on Good Morning America and Larry King Live, where they have told the story of their faith. Under any other circumstances these circulation numbers.... The only reason they can get through a day is because they know that God healed Maria but in a way their family did not like; she is whole and at home in the arms of Jesus. And yet when Mary Beth said on Good Morning America, she doesn't care if the entire world becomes better for Maria going to heaven, she is a mom and in her flesh she just wants Maria back, she just wants her little girl back - I broke.

Steven Curtis Chapman said that "we are convinced now that Maria was trying to cram a lifetime into five years of life.... She was so full of passion." I have over 17 years on Maria Sue, and sometimes I think I stand back from life. The seared scars from my past still stand in the way. But if Maria, or Terrance, or Anna, Nie, or Mighty R were here they would tell us to live our lives. So I will savor the blue skies, and the music and I will dance tonight, and laugh tonight. I will sit down tomorrow with a cup of hot cocoa and as the rain from Hurricane Hannah pounds my window I will gladly turn to my books and study and stop taking this collegiate experience for granted.

"In this world thall shall have tribulation." Life is not easy, God tells us in these words that by the grace of God. "Gods strength be perfect in one's weakness," the bible says. I have not reconciled myself with my own problems with my faith, but I have found myself turning to the comfort of Jesus even though I don't understand. But I choose that this is where I put my faith, to be able to have faith in the world, you have to have faith in Jesus. Without the later, I don't know how you can have the former.

I don't know why Anna and Maria's lives ended at the tender ages of 2 and 5. I don't know why Big J and Mighty R are allowed to leave the hospital, but Nie and Christian are still there fighting. I don't know why Big J's triump was followed by such sad news, or why Mighty R is now thriving. I don't know why we know where Anna and Maria lay but not Terrance. I don't know why this world is filled with pain, why it touches some lives deeper than others. And that is really hard. Regardless of our level of understanding, we must acknowledge the wounds, hurt, confusion, that there are questions that cannot be answered, that until the day of reckoning we will never know. But ironically on that day the answers won't matter even though we have waited our lives for them.

Today, I realize that with tragedy and pain do come rewards for overcoming the obstacles of life. That somehow in celebrating and mourning together the defeats are softened and the victories sweeter because of what we have overcome. That even though the pain will never fully heal (and would you even want it to?) we become stronger, more resilient, and confident, we stop taking things for granted, we lean on God, we rejoice at even the smallest victories. Some how after tremendous pain we start to live our lives again how we should have before.

Maybe there is no such thing as tragedy, maybe there is only hope and opportunity for growth and moving forward. We can't stop time from turning we can only look at the moment we are in now. At an all too painful time in my life I once said, "No matter how hard I wish I can't turn back time." Maybe for the first time in the 5 years since I said those words do I think that maybe it is okay that we can't, maybe I don't need to be stuck on what happened long ago, maybe I don't need to erase it. So we must come to terms with what happened yesterday and the day before that and the day before that, because being in this moment, really, is a miracle in and of itself.

P.S. I will add links later but it is 230 and I need to head to bed.

Random Images from the Day - Part 2!

2008-09-04T23:51:00.000-04:00

Random Images from the Day!

2008-09-03T22:40:00.000-04:00

Below are random images taken whenever I pulled my camera out today. The first is my lunch today, a nice cold glass of milk which they ran out of at dinner on Monday night! A turkey bbq wrap with a side of Mac-n-cheese and califlower - a favorite in my family, but these were dry and there was no vinegar :(

Half of the new mural in the upstairs portion of the dining hall, I meant to take a picture of the other half but I started talking with someone and forgot.

The line outside the cafeteria, I think there were more people outside than in.

On my way to my Chinese Domestic Political Priorities course in Walsh. These are at the bottom of the Lauinger steps with N St. in front. I am looking forward to the class material, but not the work. There is 30-35 pages of writing per semester and 200-250 pages of reading a week! Yikes!

After class, I walked down to Georgetown Cupcake. I've had a hard couple days, but a full nights sleep last night and a cupcake today and I am feeling a bit better. I didn't look at the display and just snapped the picture so it didn't turn out that well...

Last but not least a picture of my cupcake. It was a Chocolate-Vanilla cupcake and was mighty delicious. They asked if I wanted it in a bag to go and I said are you nuts I'm going to eat it now! It was very good and didn't even last half the walk back to the dorm even though I tried to savor it. The best part is a cupcake is only $3.03, which is cheaper than a latte.

Other events of the day included Drill Section for Chinese, a meeting at The Hoya (more later, but something might be in the works), a quick hello with Carol and Luke neither of which attend Georgetown anymore, and I enjoyed the smores on Copley lawn curtosey of GUTV. Oh yeah, I finally felt compelled to get up this morning after the fire alarm in Copley kept going off for about 10 seconds at random intervals. We didn't have to evacuate the building, but it had me out of bed. For some reason the bell is louder in the bathroom than the hallway. I had to pee and just about jumped off the toliet when the alarm randomly went off.

Sad news!

2008-09-03T14:14:00.001-04:00

Today Georgetown University announced the sad news that that Terrance Davis is missing and presumed dead. A junior in the College, he was on vacation from his study abroad program at the University of Cape Town, when in Harkerville, South Africa with a fellow Hoya he was hit with a rouge wave while walking along the beach and swept out to sea. There is an on going search and rescue mission underway by the equivalent of the South Africa's Coast Guard. If you are a praying person, please keep this young man and his family in your prayers. There are two services scheduled for today.

The Hoya (the student newspaper) actually broke the story in yesterday's paper and there was a prayer service Monday night in William's Chapel on the first floor of my dorm. So this news is not necessarily new, but we were hoping for an email with much better news.

This is the worst nightmare for every family with a student abroad. I know my family worried while I was in China this last summer, and to be honest it was a fear of mine. Of something happening and being called to my eternal home and not the one here on earth. I remember my freshman fall, we had lost four students the summer before and I remember the sorrow that the student body had to work through. Having heard no news this summer, I was thankful we hadn't lost anyone this summer. Sadly, it seems not to be the case.

How longs it been?

2008-08-31T16:00:00.000-04:00

At the moment the sweet refrains of the Georgetown Fight Song, as sung by the Chimes, drifts up through the open window. At our floor meeting last Wednesday my dorm's Hall Director, he is new to Georgetown, said his goal is to learn the fight song by the end of the month. It reminds me of learning the fight song one night during my NSO as we toured the Washington monuments by bus. Boy it seems so long ago, but one thing I know is I feel a sense of pride and belonging when I hear that song, and I don't know any other songs for which that is the case.

As is tradition if anyone shouts out "How longs it been?," whoever is present must break out into the fight song, which begins "Its been so long since last we met,..."

The song is actually a conglomoration of 3 different songs: "Here goes old Georgetown" comes from the 1913's "the Touchdown Song," Also included in their entirelty are "Cheer for Victory," written in 1915, and "The Hoya Song," written in 1930. One other unique element of our Fight Song is that we mention and make reference to the contemporary fight songs of Georgetown's arch-rivals in the mid to early 20th century.

The fight song is definately part of the Georgetown Tradition. In 2006 (my Freshman Year), Georgetown Students produced a film called Georgetown Forever, which not only documented many traditions at Georgetown, but brought the fight song to life. The plot of the film was pretty much the Ivy League Schools (Ivys) kidnap the Georgetown Student body president when the University refuses to join the Ivy Legue and the school through a fictional character Nash, must unite Georgetown to save it, you can watch the trailer here.

To hear the song for yourself, it can be heard here. It takes a moment for the song to load. Youcan follow along with the lyrics below.

It's been so long since last we met,
Lie down forever, lie down;
Or have you any money to bet,
Lie down forever, lie down.

There goes old... Georgetown,
Straight for a... rebound,
See how they... gain ground,
Lie down forever, lie down,
Lie down forever, lie down.

Rah! Rah! Rah!Hurrah for Georgetown,
Cheer for victory today.'
Ere the sun has sunk to rest,
In the cradle of the West,
In the clouds will proudly float The Blue and Gray.

We've heard those loyal fellows up at Yale (who?)
Brag and boast about their Boola-Boola.
We've heard the Navy yell,
We've listened to Cornell;
We've heard the sons of Harvard tell
How Crimson lines could hold them.

Choo Choo, Rah Rah, dear old Holy Cross;
The proud old Princeton tiger
Is never at a loss.
But the yell of all the yells,
The yell that wins the day,
Is the "HOYA, HOYA SAXA!"
For the dear old Blue and Gray.

HOYA! (SAXA!)
HOYA! (SAXA!)
HOYA! (SAXA!)

Oh me, oh my, oh ants!

2008-08-31T09:49:00.000-04:00

Some of you might recall that last fall shortly after moving into my basement apartment, I had an infestation of spider crickets! I still shudder thinking about them.

So I just shook my head when moving in to the dorm last Sunday, I found 5 ants crawling across my bed. I figured that since my stuff had been in storage perhaps they had transferred to my bed when I was unpacking. I squished them and said if I find more I will call facilities. Then on Tuesday or Wednesday I was studying at my desk and I had an ant crawl across my arm! I said okay one more I will call facilities. Well yesterday I was putting together tables from Ikea and I looked down. The carpet was moving! There was a line of ants crawling across the floor.

Well finally I called facilities and guess what? The facilities department is closed on the weekend. And Monday is Labor Day so they are closed then too! So I went to CVS and bought a can of ant spray, I sprayed the area and they seem to have dissipated. Oh the wonderful things life throws at you, or in this case crawls at you.

The First Day of School

2008-08-29T01:03:00.000-04:00

Today was the day... okay, "THE" day was actually 17 years ago, and my parents dressed me in a blue and white striped dress. With a barrette in my hair and tears in their eyes they took the obligatory photographs and filled with thoughts that their little girl was growing up way to fast, they took my hand and walked me into the kindergarten classroom at Open Window School. Boy have the years passed by and now the time has come... I am all grown up. No photographs today, but if there were they would show that with excitement, not tears, brimming I began my first day of my senior year of college.

I woke early (5:45am) and drove a friend to the airport before returning to campus to start my day. Even though today was Wednesday, Monday classes met (I know it is a Georgetown Thing). So my sole class was in the afternoon and it had several other students that I know from previous semesters along with myself wandering around the building looking for an elusive room number 270. It turns out that it is a tuked away conference room. The room held a camera mounted near the projector, and the 18 of us all sitting in leather swivel chairs around the mahogany table. The course on the silk road is being taught in tandem with a course at Fudan University in Shanghai and we are hoping for many opportunities for cross-cultural communication and education. And since the University is all over the opportunity to increase ties with China we were treated to the posh accommodations. Then again it just might have been because they felt sorry for us, being that we are the guinea pigs in this. Regardless, after the first day of class and knowing the work load involved I am even more excited.

The day also included 2 trips to Leo's Dining Hall (which I am going to try to muster throughout the semester). Lunch was a fairly descent BBQ Turkey wrap, fries, and grapes. Dinner was spaghetti, which I ate with 2 of GT's BBall players. The food tastes interesting enough, but because the cafeteria is packed to capacity by the time you wait in line, the food is either gone or cold. Hopefully the kinks will work out in the days ahead. That or I am going to start eating at 5 o'clock on the dot. The evening involved talking with friends in front of Healy Lawn and the floor meeting. Strangely enough I discovered I am on a floor with almost all Sophomores. At 22, and legal, I felt a bit old! No offense to anyone out there! But it is one more reminder that I am in my senior year.

I am now writing this from a friend's dorm room that is a floor below mine. The others are busy focusing on the DNC convention in general and Biden's speech in particular. I must say that so far, he is a half way decent speaker. Additionally I thought that the end of Clinton's speech was half-way decent but not the best I've heard from him. Kerry's was not only only direct attack at McCaain but actually pretty funny, and Biden's is moving and I loved the Freudian slip. BTW Biden's youngest daughter (26 y.o.) is a Georgetown Alum, so we are all hoping for a visit to campus and speech closer to election day. Currently I listen with open ears but am actually already studying away at Chinese. I think I'll head to bed in the next hour. Hope you are all having a good day! See you tomorrow!

Back on the Hilltop!

2008-08-29T01:02:00.000-04:00

I am no longer in China, no longer in Seattle, but find myself already back at Georgetown. Although the last three months of adventures were amazing and they did pass in the blink of an eye, I found that return to campus was very normal. Almost as if I never left. I am slowly settling in, reconnecting with friends, attending the welcome back barbecue and buying books. I am living back on campus this year, on the 5th floor of Copley Hall. The first official dorm built of campus and it is filled with nooks and crannies characteristic of the old Gothic style of architecture. The floor I am on is all double rooms and it is a girls only floor, though the building is co-ed, this should make for some interesting times this year.

I ate in the cafeteria for dinner tonight, which has received a complete make-over especially the menu. Hopefully this will make eating there much more interesting with more options, in previous years my main complaint has been that it gets boring pretty quickly. There is now a stir-fry area, home-cooking and carvery, deli & salad bar with fruit (on both floors), a make your own pasta station, in addition to the pasta and pizza bistro down stairs, there is also a diner with burgers fries and the like, and finally a dessert station with Hershey's ice cream and fro-yo. The decor has also changed and they painted a huge Georgetown mural on the top floor. They also switched out the big 14 person tables for table that hold approx 6 people so it is a much more laid back and intimate atmosphere, there is even a bar counter to sit at and booths and pub tables downstairs. The other big change has been to eliminate trays, they say it is for environmental reasons, but I also see it as decreasing the quantity of food taken (even though it is all you can eat-buffet style).

So that is the big news, well that and classes start tomorrow, it should be a laid back week seeing as I have only two classes and I am sure that not much more than receiving syllabi will occur. But it should be fun, plus I have already taken classes with 3 out of my 4 professors so I know a bit of what to expect and the final class is Chinese and that is pretty by the book. It should be an easier paced semester. Mondays I have 1 class, Tuesdays thru Thursday 2 classes, and Friday no class. On top of that I have my first class of the week at 2:15 in the afternoon and my last class ends on Thursday at 2:30. Oh the life of an upper classman! I am really looking forward to this semester.

A New Home!

2008-08-28T23:57:00.001-04:00

When I was in China I greatly enjoyed blogging my thoughts on the world each day to the world, so I thought I would continue to share. As my travels have come to an end and I settle back into my collegiate life at Georgetown University in Washington, DC I found it fitting that my blog should find a new home too. So welcome!

If you want to take a look at my Summer 2008 travels through China and Hong Kong, they can be viewed at: http://streetsofchina.blogspot.com/.